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Exorcism Report 6/4/2017
Translator name: Quincey Nicolo Document being translated: Audio recording of the exorcism of Karin Milona, dated 6/4/2017 Purpose: Transcript to be used as evidence in an ongoing investigation in the United States. Translator notes: I will be translating verbatim, but some concepts and phrases may not make sense in their original context in English. In these cases I will insert a Translator Note and describe what was likely meant in these scenarios. This is for your benefit, but you may disregard them legally as opinion if you wish. I was also provided with a set of pictures taken during the exorcism, and I will provide descriptions as they relate to the translation. 8:15 pm
My name is Father Richarro Montelli. I am sixty-two years old and this is my twelfth exorcism. I have been authorized by the Catholic Church to perform an Exorcism for Karin Milona, who has been determined to be possessed. The afflicted, Karin, has shown the following signs as recognized by the Church. She has begun speaking purely in a dead tongue, and many octaves lower in pitch and louder than should be possible. Only the person who she is addressing can discern her meaning, which is something we have not encountered before. She predicts accidents and injury in her neighborhood. It cannot be determined if this is premonition, however. She has also show the ability to move objects and observe occurrences over some distance as it is happening. She has shown the ability to cloud a person’s vision, or make them hallucinate. No direct control of another’s mind has been observed, but the visions have persuaded others to act in a manner of the possessor’s choosing. The entity seems to be particularly powerful. Usually there is some attempt to undermine the coming exorcism. This has not been the case, as the entity has almost seemed welcoming. Due to the unusual nature and extent of some of the powers on display, we have recommended the family bring Karin to their local church, where I will be meeting them. The possessor has shown to be cunning. I must prepare.
Translator’s note: The word used for “cunning” was furbo. Apart from its meaning, the word also implies a level of respect, and in some cases admiration. Looking into his history, his seventh exorcism was fairly similar. There was an unnamed man afflicted by what they describe as a powerful demon. Two priests had attempted the exorcism prior and determined it to be successful, but the demon returned. It also apparently started attacking the priests. Father Montelli preformed the exorcism in Rome, on all three of them at once. The ritual took three days, and the demon was never reported to return. According to an eye witness, the demon’s final words to Father Montelli were “Montelli. Your name is known to us.” Reports on his next four exorcisms show very little effort was needed. Once he entered the room, the possessed would become very compliant, and the ritual would only take minutes. In this context I believe Father Montelli knew he was up against a powerful foe, and in some way was excited for the challenge. Church of Santa Bibiana: Father Montelli prepares. In attendance are Jenna Milona (sister), John Milona (father), Father Demitri, and Father Lutou.
Father Montelli: Thank you all for coming. Tonight will not be easy, so we must prepare ourselves for the trials to come. Father Lutou will be taking confession from all, including myself, Then Father Demitri will take his. Once this is complete you must keep a focused mind. We will pray and prepare for the trial ahead. You will be given a paper with notes, as there will be call and answer prayers to recite and protocol to follow. You will also be marked with holy water and a crucifix which has been blessed. Once the exorcism has begun there will be no time for questions, hesitation, or doubt. For Karin’s sake you must set your mind to war.
At this time the recording is shut off. According to the report this is when confession was taken and the ritual was explained to the family. Father Lutou then left with Jenna to bring Karin to the church. The recording picks back up over an hour later. Father Lutou had been killed in a car wreck, and Karin was being moved to the hospital. Jenna called from the ambulance, which was also involved in a wreck, to give Father Montelli their location. The recording begins as Father Montelli, Father Demitri, and John Milona arrive at the scene. I was provided a picture of the scene. The ambulance was on its side, and the fron cab appeared to be pretty mangled. Jenna was scraped up and bleeding from a few wounds, but was standing. Karin was restrained in the gurney in the road behind the ambulance. She appears to be laughing.
Father Montelli: Jenna, are you alright? Jenna: Yes, Father. It is not serious. Father Dimitri: Do you still have your paper? Are you prepared? Jenna: Yes. Father Montelli: John, take a moment to be with Jenna. We will not have time for distraction once we get started, John: Thank you, Father. Father Montelli: Dimitri, help me move her to the sidewalk.
Sounds of the gurney being rolled. Parts are scraping as it is apparently damaged, and Karin can be heard laughing at an inhuman pitch and volume.
Father Dimitri (calmly): Be silent.
The laughing stops.
Jenna: We are ready, Father. Father Montelli: Good, we shall begin. Jenna, approach Karin. You will need to remain by her side for the duration. Your task will be difficult. If she is harassed by the possessor you will need to hold and comfort her. We will not be able to intercede in this manner, so you must remain focused and vigilant throughout. John, follow Father Dimitri’s lead. Is everyone ready? All: Yes. Father Montelli: Do not keep in mind, O Lord, our offenses or those of our parents, nor take vengeance on our sins. Our Father (inaudible) And lead us not into temptation. All: But deliver us from evil.
Father Dimitri reads Psalm 53
Father Montelli: Save your servant. All: Who trusts in you, my God.
Multiple cars are heard pulling up at this point. Car doors open and close, footsteps approach.
Unidentified person: Father, we arrived as fast as we could. Father Montelli: We have already begun. Set up a perimeter, do not let anyone intervene.
Footsteps retreat, inaudible instructions are shouted in the background. Background noise indicates some kind of barrier being erected.
Father Montelli: Let her find in you, Lord, a fortified tower. All: In the face of the enemy. Father Montelli: Let the enemy have no power over her. All: And the son of iniquity be powerless to harm her. Father Montelli: Lord, send her aid from your holy place. All: And watch over him her from Sion. Father Montelli: Lord, heed my prayer. All: And let my cry be heard by you. Father Montelli: The Lord be with you. All: May He also be with you. Karin: (loud screaming in an unknown language) Father Montelli: You will soon see, demon. Let us pray.
Father Montelli’s prayer is barely audible through the screams from Karin. The prayer is read steadily without pause or change in inflection.
Father Montelli: SILENCE!
Karin falls silent.
Father Montelli: I command you, unclean spirit, whoever you are, along with all your minions now attacking this servant of God, by the mysteries of the incarnation, passion, resurrection, and ascension of our Lord Jesus Christ, by the descent of the Holy Spirit, by the coming of our Lord for judgment, that you tell me by some sign your name… Karin: (though the words are in what I assume is the previously used unknown language, I could understand their meaning) I am the sightless one, granter of visions. I am the Second Seal, unbroken, yet unleashed. I am a bringer of distrust, of fear, of war. Father Montelli: (Clearly shaken) I command you, moreover, to obey me to the letter, I who am a minister of God despite my unworthiness; nor shall you be emboldened to harm in any way this creature of God, or the bystanders, or any of their possessions. Karin: (Speaks an unknown language, this time I cannot understand the meaning)
At this point, many bible verses are read. Karin thrashes about, screaming and laughing. A picture was taken at this time. Jenna is seen holding Karin around the shoulders. Fathers Montelli and Dimitri appear to be making the sign of the cross over themselves, and John is on his knees looking over his daughters. In the background there appears to be a police barricade set up, manned by men in robes. It’s hard to make out exactly what is happening, as the background is a bit blurry and dark.
Father Montelli: See the cross of the Lord; begone, you hostile powers!
There is a very loud hiss, probably from Karin.
All: The stem of David, the lion of Juda's tribe has conquered. Father Montelli: Lord, heed my prayer. All: And let my cry be heard by you. Father Montelli: The Lord be with you. All: May He also be with you.
Father Montelli says an inaudible prayer as Karin begins to scream frantically. It appears to be her voice, not the entity’s.
Father Montelli: I cast you out, unclean spirit, along with every satanic power of the enemy, every spectre from hell, and all your fell companions; in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. Begone and stay far from this creature of God Karin: (in her voice) Father… please… (In the other voice, screaming in the unknown language) Father Montelli: For it is He who commands you, He who flung you headlong from the heights of heaven into the depths of hell. Karin: (in her voice) Father, I can’t… (simultaneously laughing is heard from the other voice) Father Montelli: It is He who commands you, He who once stilled the sea and the wind and the storm. Karin: (unknown language) Father Dimitri: The line will hold, demon. Father Montelli: Hearken, therefore, and tremble in fear, Satan, you enemy of the faith, you foe of the human race, you begetter of death, you robber of life, you corrupter of justice, you root of all evil and vice, seducer of men, betrayer of the nations, instigator of envy, font of avarice, fomenter of discord, author of pain and sorrow. Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) So many titles, but they are not mine. Unknown man (from distance, barely audible): Father, we need to move! We’re being overrun! Father Montelli: Why, then, do you stand and resist, knowing as you must that Christ the Lord brings your plans to nothing? Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) Do you not know of His plans? Have you not read every book in your archives? Have you not ventured beyond the locked gates, into the forbidden vaults? Perhaps you should adopt the title trespasser? Eater of fruits?. Father Montelli: Fear Him, who in Isaac was offered in sacrifice, in Joseph sold into bondage, slain as the paschal lamb, crucified as man, yet triumphed over the powers of hell. Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) Perhaps, nonbeliever? Father Montelli: Begone, then, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Give place to the Holy Spirit by this sign of the holy cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, who lives and reigns with the Father and the Holy Spirit, God, forever and ever. Karin: (loud laughter)
In the background you can hear something large and metal, like a frame or scaffolding fall and scatter.
Unknown man: Pick up the girl and take her inside. Father, gather your men and follow them. Continue the ritual inside. We can no longer keep you safe out here. Father Montelli: Jenna, hold tightly to your sister. Brothers, do not let them separate.
From here there are sounds of shouting, things being throw, fighting, dragging, doors slamming, frantic echoes in hallways, distant gun shots, and finally the closing of a door as voices gather in what sounds like a smaller room. A series of pictures shows a mob of people overrunning a barrier. Men in robes push back but are being overwhelmed. A man in a black robe appears to be praying, arms stretched towards the crowd. Men in red robes with guns are seen stepping out of a vehicle. The next shows two men in robes carrying Karin’s gurney down a dim hallway. Jenna is in step with them and appears to be trying to comfort her sister. The last shows the seven of them in a small room. The two unidentified men are lighting candles, which is the only source of light in the room. Karin appears to be smiling.
Father Montelli: I adjure you, ancient serpent, by the judge of the living and the dead, by your Creator, by the Creator of the whole universe, by Him who has the power to consign you to hell, to depart forthwith in fear, along with your savage minions, from this servant of God, who seeks refuge in the fold of the Church. Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) Serpent? Who are you addressing? Father Montelli: I adjure you again, not by my weakness but by the might of the Holy Spirit, to depart from this servant of God, whom almighty God has made in His image. Yield, therefore, yield not to my own person but to the minister of Christ. For it is the power of Christ that compels you, who brought you low by His cross. Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) You know my name. Call upon me, and I will do as I am told. Father Montelli: Tremble before that mighty arm that broke asunder the dark prison walls and led souls forth to light. Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) You are known to us, Montelli. You who would steal a key. Who would trespass on what your high priests and bishops would call sacred ground. Who would study forbidden scrolls. Father Montelli: May the trembling that afflicts this human frame, the fear that afflicts this image of God, descend on you. Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) You who no longer believes. Father Montelli: Silence, fiend! You dare speak of my belief? I who have so dutifully banished so many of you? You who know my name? You would presume to tell me I no longer believe in Almighty God? Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) We know you believe in God, as do we. You no longer believe He will always answer your call. You no longer believe that when what was written on the black scroll comes to pass, that His eye will remain on this world. You know my name. Call upon me, and I will do as I am told.
There is a long pause here. Father Montelli starts weeping, and Father Dimitri tries to comfort him. The dialogue between them is barely audible. In the background you can hear fighting from somewhere in the building. It escalates and moves closer.
Father Montelli: (as he starts to speak there is a loud spike of static) Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) Yes, eater of fruits. What is your will? Father Montelli: Do what you must.
At this point the door bursts open and gunfire is heard. The tape ends suddenly, and there are no further pictures of the event.
Since I recently played through the game in Spanish, I thought I'd record some of the differences/similarities between the Spanish and English translations. I'm pretty certain that both versions were translated from the original Japanese, so the Spanish isn't just a later copy of the English version; they're just adapted differently from the source. No matter how I played it, I enjoyed going through this game twice. If I missed something you want to know, specific or otherwise, I can answer it. OVERALL:
The tone of the game is the exact same across English, Spanish and Japanese. English is by far the most different of any Paper Mario TTYD translation that I've seen. Spanish is a lot closer to Japanese. Think about how Nintendo of America makes a lot of changes, whereas Nintendo of Europe makes less changes. That's a way in which you can see the difference. Sometimes it's better in English when things get exaggerated, somethings it's better in Spanish when exaggeration really isn't needed.
This is a side-effect of the PAL version (which thankfully can run at 60hz like NTSC), but Mario cannot raise his hand in Spanish. This is because the PAL version outright removes that animation. A case of Nintendo being sensitive, as Nintendo of Europe thought that Mario raising his hand looked too much like a Nazi salute. It doesn't change anything, but it's weird. I mean, I'm pretty sure he does it in the PAL version of the first game.
A lot of the in-universe text was altered to reflect the Spanish language. So signs that say OPEN now say ABRIERTA. The rotating sign in front of the Glitz Pit says BIENVENIDOS instead of YOU'RE WELCOME. Unlike the first game, I don't think everything was translated. But most is.
PARTNERS:
All names were changed except for Koops and Yoshi. Goombella is Goomarina, Flurrie is Claudia, Vivian is Bibiana, Bobbery is Bombard and Ms. Mowz is Lupina.
In regards to personality, they're all the same. Goombella is snarky, Koops is timid, Flurrie talks more fancily, etc. They're not quite as exaggerated as in English though.
Vivian is male in the Spanish localisation. In addition to the scene from Chapter 2, her partner description reads, "Este antiguo miembro del Trío de las Sombras parece una chica, pero en realidad es un chico." In English, "This long-standing member of the Shadow Trio looks like a girl, but is a boy in reality." I still like hehis character nonetheless; personality-wise, she's the exact same.
Flurrie always refers to Mario as pichoncito. I don't know how I'd translate this. It's literally little/baby bird, but it's used as a term of endearment here. Similar to how she says darling in English.
Vivian constantly refers to Mario as cariño. This is the equivalent of calling someone sweetheart or baby. She does this as early as Chapter 4 too. She also has a tendency to scream like "Kyaah", unlike other characters.
Yoshi still calls Mario Gonzales. Although he uses the original Spanish spelling of the name, Gonzáles.
She's not a partner, but I don't know where else to throw this in. Toadette. This is the only Mario game in Spanish where she has a different name. Granted, it makes sense because it's the first game they translated with her in it (Double Dash is either English or Japanese). She's called T. Ana in this game. It's a nice sounding name, but later games continue to call her Toadette like the rest of the world (except for Asia).
SPECIALS:
All the Crystal Stars retain their names, just properly brought over to Spanish. The only exception is the Gold Star, which has been dubbed the Topaz Star in Spanish.
Sweet Treat (Map) is Recuperar, meaning Recover.
Earth Tremor (Diamond) is Terremoto, meaning Earthquake.
Clock Out (Emerald) is Tiempo Muerto, meaning Dead Time.
Power Lift (Gold) is Recargar, meaning Recharge.
Art Attack (Ruby) is Ataque Estelar, meaning Star Attack.
Sweet Feast (Sapphire) is Como Nuevo, meaning Like New.
Showstopper (Garnet) is Golpe Final, meaning Final Strike.
Supernova (Crystal) is Tormenta Estelar, meaning Star Storm.
PROLOGUE:
Rogueport is called Villa Viciosa (Vicious Town).
Lord Crump is called Peke X. This is close to his Japanese name, ペケダ― (Pekedá).
The X-Nauts are called Mega X, which is again, a closer adaptation of the Japanese name.
Lord Crump asking where Mario and Goombella disappeared to was shortened heavily: ENGLISH: Where'd they go?!? Huh? You! Johnson! Did you see them? Did anyone? Uh... Crud! They bolted! SPANISH: ¿Dónde se han metido? ¡Maldición! ¡Se han escapado! REVERSE: Where did they go? Damn it! They've escaped!
Frankly is changed to Goomez. He mistakes Goombella's names as Goomberta and Goomaría here.
Goombella's comeback to the Goombas hitting on her: ENGLISH: Oh, it is, like, SO sweet that you boys think I'm cute! Seriously! Yeah, guys like you make me feel like TOTALLY BARFING! Now get out of our way! SPANISH: Sois muy amables al reconocer mis encantos. Pero lamento deciros que a los tipos como vosotros... ¡NO LOS AGUANTO! ¡Así que ya os estáis largando con viento fresco! REVERSE: You guys are really nice, recognising my charms. But I'm sorry to tell you that I CAN'T STAND guys like you! So get out of here as fast as you came!
The Chest Demons in general aren't as...silly in the Spanish version: ENGLISH: Buggly-wuggly-WOOOOOOO! You're cursed! SPANISH: ¡Caiga la maldición sobre ti! REVERSE: May the curse fall upon you!
CHAPTER 1:
Petalburg is called Villa Verde (Green Town). Petal Meadows is called Llanura Estelar (StaStellar Plain).
Dupree, the blue guy with the pink afro, is literally called Afro in Spanish. He doesn't have a fake French accent here, but still tries to talk in try-hard a flirting manner, so his humour is maintained.
The questions for the test in the fortress are all the same.
Fuzzies say "¡Miiiimiiiooon!" in Spanish.
Shine Sprites are just called Soles (Suns) in this game. Probably a holdover from Super Mario Sunshine's Spanish translation.
Hooktail is male. I think this is even a change from the Japanese version. Her (or his) name is Gombaba, which is the exact same as the Japanese version.
I thought one of the questions Hooktail asks would be different in Spanish. But from start to end, they're similar, albeit simpler: ENGLISH: Well, I suppose I could apologise by letting you smell the bottoms of my feet. People pay good money to do this. I'm being completely honest right now. Really. So? Care to take a whiff of the rich, yet delicate scent of my world-renowned feet? (Maybe just a quick sniff... / That's disgusting!) SPANISH: En ese caso, te concederé el honor de ver las garras de mis pies. ¿No te gustaría acercarte y admirar su belleza? (Solo un poco / ¿Estás bromenado?) REVERSE: In that case, I will grant you the honour of seeing the claws of my feet. Wouldn't you like to get closer and admire their beauty. (Just a little / You're joking, right?)
Sir Grodus is called Señor Xenón (Sir Xenón) in Spanish. All other X-Nauts and Beldom refer to him as usted, which is used in Spanish for talking to superiors or strangers (respectful). Characters like Peach refer to him as tú, which is meant generally for friends, family or peers of the same age. It's rude to call somebody older that if you don't know them well enough, which makes sense for Peach (he kidnapped her).
With that, the X-Nauts don't talk in a casual buddy-buddy fashion. Most of the time, they talk appropriately and like they're on a serious job. It unfortunately takes away a bit of the humour, but makes more sense to make them seem like a credible threat.
TEC is CIM (Computador Inteligente de Mega X) in Spanish. What's odd is that his initials refer to him as computador (more Latin), but in dialogue, he always calls himself an ordenador (more Spain). In terms of how he addresses characters, he does it casually like in English; he address Peach with tú and not usted.
When Mario gets an e-mail from Peach, Goombella's response: ENGLISH: Mario? Are you OK? You're totally shaking... Do you need a bathroom? SPANISH: ¿Te pasa algo, Mario? Estás temblando. ¿Te encuentras mal? REVERSE: Is something wrong, Mario? You're shaking. You sick?
CHAPTER 2:
The Boggly Woods are called El Bosque Maravilloso (The Wonderful Forest) in Spanish. The Great Tree has the exact same name as in English, El Gran Árbol.
Beldom is Piruja in Spanish. It's a pun on bruja, the word for witch. Marliyn is Maruja. With a name scheme like that, you can see how Vivian sticks out (Bibiana). Also, Marilyn says "Vaya" in Spanish.
When Beldom realises who Mario is, her dialogue is way longer in English. I knew something was off when I played in Spanish: ENGLISH: Wow! This Mario guy looks so manly! Check out that bushy mustache... How handsome! You know something, though, my lovelies? I swear I've seen this gentleman before... AAAAAAAAAAAACK! He's Mr. Mustache! SPANISH: ¡Maldita sea! ¡Si es el tipo del bigote! REVERSE: Damn it all! It's the guy with the mustache!
Instead of saying "The three..." Marilyn continues to just say Vaya. It's interrupted like this: BELDOM: Somos... (We are...) MARILYN: Vaaaya... VIVIAN: ¡Las Hermanas Sombra! (The Shadow Sisters)
Beldom's insult to Vivian. Spanish is basically from the Japanese version: ENGLISH: I don't see three beauties! I see two, but then there's you, and you're PLUG-UGLY!!! SPANISH: ¿Y de dónde te has sacado eso de hermanas? ¡Pero si tú eres un hombre! REVERSE: And where did you get sisters from that? YOU are a MAN!
Goombella's Tattle on Vivian as well: ENGLISH: That's Vivian. She's the youngest of the three Shadow Sirens. She doesn't seem all that noteworthy. Uh... She is kinda cute, I guess... She might even be cuter than I am... I guess... ...Uh... What am I thinking? SPANISH: ¡Es Bibiana! La más pequeña del trío... Bueno... EL más pequeño. No posee ninguna característica especial. Aunque es verdad que... Hmmm... Es bastante mono. Tal vez más que yo. ¿Eh...? ¿En... en qué estaré pensando, si se puede saber? REVERSE: She's Vivian! The smallest girl of the trio... Well... the smallest BOY. He doesn't have any special characteristics. Although it's true that... Hmmm... He's pretty cute. Maybe even cuter than me. Eh...? W-What am I gonna be thinking about later, if I may ask?
After defeating the three, Beldom goes: ENGLISH: Mmmmwee hee haaaack! Oooog. Maybe we were just a touch overconfident... SPANISH: ¡Maldición! ¡No deberíamos haberte subestimado! REVERSE: Damn it! We shouldn't have underestimated you!
I can't remember specifically, but I believe the "You got a Super Boots" typo was corrected in Spanish. For non-English/Japanese languages, the game has a programming system to specify what gender each item is. With that, I believe they put something along the lines of, "Has conseguido unas Súper Botas!" (You got some Super Boots)
The exchange between the Puni Elder and Lord Crump is less exaggerated in Spanish: ENGLISH: WHAT?!? Did you just call me an "old geezer"? Where do you get off, talking like that? You got no respect, brat! Don't think my age has a thing to do with my might! Even if it kills me, I won't let you through! I'm ready! ELDER POWER ACTIVATE! SPANISH: ¡Estúpido! ¿Qué modales son esos, jovencito? ¿Acaso no sabes a quién te estás dirigiendo? ¡Me parece que voy a tener que leerte la cartilla! REVERSE: Dumbass! What kind of manners are those, young man? Don't you know who you're addressing? Looks like I'm going to have to read you the primer!
An example of the X-Nauts more direct talk in Spanish: ENGLISH: Uh, I'm sorry, sir! Unfortunately, Mario laid a beating on all of them! SPANISH: Por... por desgracia parece ser que han sido incapaces de derrotar a Mario... REVERSE: Un... Unfortunately it seems that they were incapable of defeating Mario...
This isn't Chapter 2, but I honestly forget when this encounter happens. When Bowser enters the Great Tree with Kammy, his dialogue choices are different in Spanish. I like them more in English, for the latter choice: ENGLISH: (You're BOTH too old! HAR) (It's hag vs. hag! Awesome!) SPANISH: (Si son igual de viejas) (Mira quién habla) REVERSE: (They're both just as old) (Look who's talking)
CHAPTER 3:
Glitzville is called Ciudad Dojo (Dojo City) in Spanish.
Rawk Hawk's name in Spanish is Hawk Hogan. You can guess where that comes from. He also says that amateurs should stay at home playing Super Smash Bros. Melee.
Grubba in Spanish is called Leonardo.
Jolene in Spanish is T. Lisa. For Mush, they made his real and stage names more different. His real name is T. Roonie, but his stage name (which the game asks in Chapter 7's quiz) is T. Rex.
Just because I thought it was funny, Crawdaddy is literally called The Bone Crusher in Spanish, Rompehuesos.
Crawdaddy's line is very similar between both versions, just more direct in Spanish: ENGLISH: Foolish mortals... I will drag you through the gate to the netherworld! SPANISH: ¡Os mandaré hasta las mismísimas puertas del infierno! REVERSE: I'll send you [all] to the very gates of Hell!
Grubba once you catch him. He doesn't have a unique accent that I can detect in Spanish: ENGLISH: I gotta say, y'all are a coupla slack-jawed idiots, sniffin' 'round my business... Now you know my big secret, I'm afraid yer gonna have to take a li'l ol' dirt nap. SPANISH: ¡Habéis sido muy imprudentes siguiéndome hasta aquí! ¡Ahora que sabéis mi secreto, lo pagaréis muy caro! REVERSE: You all have been very reckless, following me here! Now that you know my secret, you're gonna pay dearly!
CHAPTER 4:
Twilight Town is called Villa Sombría (Gloomy Town).
Creepy Steeple is called Templo Lúgubre (Gloomy Temple).
Doopliss is called Rumpel. This is actually consistent with every version but the English release. Even the Japanese version called him Rumpel [ランペル] (you have to find the katakana "ン" letter instead of the Latin letter "p"). I don't know why they changed his name in English, as he's clearly based off Rumpelstiltskin.
Doopliss also doesn't call Mario by "Slick". He has no nickname for him in Spanish.
Doopliss's laugh is changed. Instead of going "Yuk", he goes "Juasjuasjuasjuas". In English it'd be like "Huahuahua", but the H would sound more like a Dutch/German CH (loch).
Doopliss's reaction to you discovering his name is bigger in Spanish: ENGLISH: Wha... What did you just say?!? It can't be... NO! NO! NO! WHY? WHY? WHY? HOW? HOW? HOW? I'm...feeling...faint... SPANISH: Co... ¿¡Cómo has conseguido acertar mi nombre!? No... no me lo puedo creer... No... no... no... No... puede... ser... ¿Pe... pe... pe... pero cómo lo has adivinado? ¡Ayayayayayayayayay...! ¡Todo me da vueltas...! ¡¡Qué mareooo...!! REVERSE: How... How did you get my name right!? I... I can't believe it... No... no... no... It... can't... be... How... how... how did you guess it? Ayayayayayayayayay! Everything's spinning...! So dizzy...!!
What Vivian says when she learns she was helping Mario. She expresses concern about what her sisters will do to her: ENGLISH: I don't believe it. All this time I was helping Mario... I feel like an idiot... SPANISH: Pero entonces... ¿He estado ayudando a la persona equivocada...? ¿Y ahora qué será de mí? REVERSE: But then... I've been helping the WRONG person...? Now what's gonna happen to me?
Doopliss's follow-up remark: ENGLISH: What's going on here, huh? Fight with your girlfriend? Well, don't expect any sympathy from us, ghoulies! SPANISH: Vaya, vaya... ¿Así que hay disensiones en el grupito...? ¡Que sepáis que no por eso voy a trataros con mayor respeto...! REVERSE: Well, well... So now there's a division in this little group...? Just to let you know, that doesn't mean I'm going to treat you with any more respect!
Vivian's line when she comes back to the party is retained, but shorter. When she's underground she admits her final choice and when she surfaces she throws support to Mario. In English, she doesn't do the latter. Both work, but the English version is stronger for her development: ENGLISH: I'm... I'm sorry, Sis... This Mario is the only person who's ever been kind to me... * Mario! I'm fighting by your side from now on! I've... I've made my choice! And I'm not turning back! SPANISH: Lo siento, Piruja... Pero estoy decidida a ayudar a Mario. * ¡No desfallezcas, Mario! Mantente firme... ¡Que ya casi lo tienes! REVERSE: I'm sorry, Beldom... But I'm committed to helping Mario. * Don't worry, Mario! Keep it together... You're almost there!
Doopliss's line after defeat: ENGLISH: Rats! YOU KILLJOYS!!! SPANISH: ¡Maldita sea! ¡¡Te acordarás de esta!! REVERSE: Damn it! You'll remember this!! (speaking directly to Mario, not the whole group)
Vivian's penultimate line: ENGLISH: Uh... Listen, Mario... Sorry about earlier... I'd be happy to travel with you if you'd have me. SPANISH: Me da un poco de vergüenza volver a decir esto, Mario... ¿Me dejas ser tu amiga, cariño? REVERSE: I'm a little embarrassed to say this again, Mario... Will you let me be your friend, sugar?
CHAPTER 5:
The fourth-wall references are the exact same.
Keelhaul Key's name is generic in every language but English and German. Here, it's Isla Trópico (Tropical Island).
Podley, local resident bar asshole, is called Don Bean in Spanish.
Scarlette's name is changed to Bombaret.
Flavio's name is Marco. Pa-Patch's name is Bomberto. Flavio's ship, the S.S. Flavion, is called El Temido (The Feared) in Spanish. Ironic given Flavio's scared nature.
Cortez is the exact same, although he adapts the original Spanish spelling, Cortés.
Embers are...kind of bizzarre. They're called Ascua in Spanish, which is the literal translation of the word. So it's not incorrect by any means. It's just weird because in the first game, I remember them being called Elmos, which makes more sense because it's an adaptation of the Japanese name, which is a reference to St. Elmo's fire.
Chuckola Cola is Bombioja in Spanish. It's a pun on Bomb and Rioja, which is a place in Spain known for wine. The drink is actually red wine, so the name change makes sense.
The Black Skull is called the Black Joke in Spanish. Yes, it uses an English name.
Peach's reaction to getting naked is toned down mildly: ENGLISH: What?!? That's indecent! No way! SPANISH: ¿¡Qué has dicho...!? ¿No te das cuenta de que...? REVERSE: What did you say!? Don't you realise...?
CHAPTER 6:
This is where you start to see how lazy some of the places get named in the Spanish version. Poshley Heights is called Villa Preciosa (Precious Town). That is the fourth main area with Town in the name. Riverside Station is just a literal translation, Estación de Riverside.
Pennington still calls Mario Luigi in Spanish. But his name is changed to Holmot.
The Smorgs are known as Miomio in Spanish. It's not the same as the Japanese text (Moamoa), but it's closer than English. If you read their name like normal Spanish (remember, they say they're name out-loud all the time), it sounds like they're saying, "Mine, mine, mine, mine!" Like the seagulls in Finding Nemo.
CHAPTER 7:
Fahr Outpost is called Bomburgo. From how the characters speak, you wouldn't detect much of a foreign/Russian accent. That's the case for many non-English languages in media; there are a lot of potential local dialects, but not many international ones. Spanish is more international though, so I don't know, since the game is already based on a Spain accent, they could've given the bombs an Argentian accent (saying vos sos instead of tú eres) or something.
During the General White chase, Pa-Patch directly tells Mario that General White went to Glitzville in Spanish. In English, he just mentions an arena. If you're speeding through the dialogue (without direct knowledge of where to go next), you'll at least catch where to go in Spanish.
On that, General White in Spanish is a pun name, General Bomblanco (General White-Bomb).
The Mayor is less rude to Bobbery in Spanish: ENGLISH: SHUSH! You call yourself a Bob-omb? I spit at you! You know rules! There is to be NO mention of cannon to non-Bob-ombs! NO mention! SPANISH: ¡Oh! ¡Tú también eres un Bob-omb! En ese caso, seré franco. No puedo revelar nada sobre el Gran Cañón a nadie que no sea un Bob-omb. REVERSE: Oh! You too are a Bob-omb! In that case, I will be frank. I cannot reveal anything about the Grande Boom to anyone who isn't a Bob-omb.
Crump's boast about Magnus von Grapple 2.0: ENGLISH: Yeah, last version was buggy, so we made improvements... One... two... A DOZEN!!! SPANISH: ¡Mazinrobo X2 no se puede comparar con el anterior, ni en velocidad ni en potencia! REVERSE: Von Grapple 2.0 can't be compared to the previous revision, neither in speed nor prowess!
Right before fighting Magnus von Grapple 2.0, I noticed Vivian's line is changed; I like it more in Spanish: ENGLISH: You're the one who's going to suffer, Crump! No matter how many times we do this! SPANISH: Como diría Piruja: ¡Jijijí! ¡Te daremos un escarmiento! REVERSE: Like Beldom would say: Mweeheehee! We're gonna give you a punishment!
Same goes for Bobbery's line: ENGLISH: I say, old boy, I rather think YOU'RE going to be the one doing the suffering! SPANISH: ¡Fruslerías! ¡Déjate de tanta palabrería barata y demuéstralo! REVERSE: Nonsense! Quit all that cheap talk and prove it!
TEC's description of what will happen to him is less wordy in Spanish: ENGLISH: When the power is all gone... I will... Cease to exist...as an artificial consciousness. SPANISH: Sin suministro de energía... yo... dejaré de estar operativo. REVERSE: With no power supply... I... will no longer be operational.
CHAPTER 8:
The Palace of Shadow uses its Japanese name in Spanish, El Palecio de la Oscuridad (The Palace of Darkness).
What Dark Bones says before being awoken: ENGLISH: Glurgggghh... Bluuuurgh... None shall pass by... Let those who would disturb her sleep fall into the depths of endless darkness... SPANISH: ¡Uuuh! ¡Uuuoooh! Este lugar está vedado a los mortales... Aquellos que osen profanar el lugar donde ella reposa, se sumirán en las tinieblas. REVERSE: Oooh! OOOH! This place is forbidden to mortals... Those who dare to desecrate the place where she rests shall be plunged into darkness.
Gloomtail's name is Bumbaba. This is the line he says confirming Hooktail's gender: ENGLISH: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!? You destroyed my precious younger sister?!? SPANISH: ¿¡Cómo!? ¿Qué habéis hecho con mi hermano? REVERSE: What!? What have you [all] done with my brother?
Vivian's line to Beldom before fighting her: ENGLISH: I'm with Mario all the way! Today, Sis... I'm going to punish YOU, you hear me? SPANISH: ¡Mario ha sido mi salvador! ¡Y él os dará vuestra merecido! REVERSE: Mario's been my saviour! And HE'S gonna give you guys what you deserve!
Remember that weird oversight in the English version with Grodus responding opposite to what you chose? They fixed it in Spanish, simply by swapping Attack and Don't Attack.
Bowser's comment before facing Mario: ENGLISH: Aww, all worn out from battle, Mario? Yes! Easy pickings! Today's the day I flush a plumber down the drain! SPANISH: ¡En tu patético estado, no serás rival para mí! ¡Esta es mi gran oportunidad de acabar contigo! REVERSE: In your pathetic state, you're no match for me! This is my grand opportunity to finish you off!
Grodus refers to the Shadow Queen as tú in Spanish, showing that he views them on the same level or is still above her. If he were to show respect, he'd use usted or maybe even vos.
Shadow Queen right before possessing Peach. Can't tell which is creepier: ENGLISH: Yessss... A fine vessel... Now... SPANISH: Hmmm... Joven y bella... Me parece perfecta... REVERSE: Hmmm... Young and beautiful... She's perfect for me...
Upon zapping Grodus, Shadow Queen: ENGLISH: You would do well to learn your proper place, slave. No one commands me. SPANISH: Está claro que no sabes con quién hablas y ello te ha valido un severo castigo. REVERSE: It is clear that you do not know who you are talking to, and this has earned you a severe punishment.
Shadow Queen after Peach heals the player: ENGLISH: GRRRRRR! Very cunning, Princess! But you will not undo me!!! Know me as your queen! SPANISH: ¡Hagas lo que hagas, será inútil! ¡Yo soy la Reina de las Sombras! REVERSE: No matter what you do, it's in vain! I am the Shadow Queen!
Benjamin Solari Parraviccini Click the link on the name and you can see many of the psychografies – Parraviccinis angel-led drawings. https://preview.redd.it/6n2aoh2dd4k51.png?width=196&format=png&auto=webp&s=bcde2dd2d18980dd04a4ac79936093589192ac38 This is the story of a most unassuming modern prophet – Benjamín Solari Parravicini (BSP) – who was born in Buenos Aires, Argentina in 1898, and died in 1974 at the age of 76. He was a painter and sculptor, and came from a traditional and well-to-do family. He held various posts with the Buenos Aires Municipal Arts Department; nothing particularly memorable nor exceptional about his social and professional life. He was a quiet, discrete and kindly person. Leading a low-profile life, he would have remained almost totally unknown to the world were it not for the fact that he had the uncanny gift of being able to peer into the future. With time, Benjamín Solari Parravicini – ‘Pelón’ as his friends nicknamed him – has become widely known both inside and outside his native Argentina because of the “messages,” as he called them, he received from his “Guardian Angel” about coming events. Contrary to what some in Argentina and elsewhere would have us believe, true to his unassuming style BSP never said he had “mystic visions” nor that the future appeared to him as a burning bush of divine inspiration. Nothing of the sort: he would suddenly become inspired by a feeling, and his Guardian Angel would send him one of many “messages” that he felt compelled to draw in pencil or charcoal in the simplest of forms; mostly as just one continuous line producing an image often rather naïve, to which he would add his written “explanation.” In this way, BSP fashioned and shaped more than 700 prophetic “messages” that mostly relate to transcendental and dramatic events affecting the world of his time and after his time, many of which are centred on his native Argentina. Most of these messages were revealed to him in the 1940s and 1950s, but he continued to receive them until just before his death in the 1970s. As with most prophetic lore, both the images and the prose are, for the most part, enigmatic. That is until passing events make them become clearer – often crystal clear. Such is also the case with other prophetic literature as the quadrants of Nostradamus, the papal prophecies of St. Malachy of Armagh in Ireland, and of other more modern sages from Edgar Cayce to Jean Dixon. The interesting thing about BSP is that each message carries both a visual symbolic sketched drawing that speaks primarily to our emotions and intuition, whilst the written prose – normally set down by him afterwards when fully awake – speaks more to our intellect. No doubt, a good combination for today’s mindset where our worldview of reality is so heavily biased towards the intellectual. BSP gives us a more balanced appraisal of these messages both in their unconscious content – perhaps messages from the Collective Unconscious – and how he felt they could be intellectually “aligned” to make sense in today’s “real world.” Thus, with time his “psychographies” – as he called these images and texts – were found to predict many highly dramatic events of the modern world: the fall of Hitler and Mussolini after World War II, the rise of Castro in Cuba, satellite communications, the destruction of the World Trade Center Twin Towers in New York City, artificial heart transplants, the atomic bomb… Many of BSP’s messages refer to Argentina for which in 1971 he envisioned miseries and mishaps at a national level; he saw a great falling down and went so far as to warn that Argentina would suffer its own bloody “French Revolution” that may sink it into severe turmoil unless Argentineans recognise and accept “The Grey Man” who will someday hopefully place Argentina back on the right track from which it has strayed so very far. If that does finally happen, then he envisions Argentina and South America in general as a “beacon for the whole world” after the coming catastrophes of artificial and natural origins envisioned by so many. Much has been written about what he meant by “The Grey Man” – el Hombre Gris. An unknown social or political reformer? A metaphor for the middle class? The common working man and woman? No one knows although in today’s decadent Argentina one thing is sure: this reforming political figure has definitely not shown up yet!
The Collection of Psychographies
The author of this article was lucky to have been a friend of Sigurd von Wurmb and his kindly wife, Ana María, who were long acquainted with BSP from his early years. After BSP’s death they received a good part of his psychographies, many of which von Wurmb catalogued and then published in four volumes released through the local Kier Publishing House in Buenos Aires. Regrettably, Sigurd von Wurmb passed away in January 2007, however he left a very good and sequential account of what BSP’s work was all about; a website dedicated to him (in Spanish) can be accessed at sigurdvonwurmb.com. Today, Ms Bibiana Bryson, with whom the author is acquainted, continues that work and is also custodian to another sizeable portion of BSP’s psychographies. She manages an excellent and authoritative website (www.freewebs.com/bibianabryson/parravicini.htm) on BSP in which she publishes information and research done on his work, as well as new interpretations based on major world events as they unfold.
The Cross Symbol
As to the source of his knowledge, BSP spoke of “superior beings” who made known to him their grave concern over the future of mankind. Notably, he spoke of José de Aragón, a monk-like figure he considered his Guardian Angel, who egged him on to draw and speak to future generations. He even told him to draw a symbol to inspire the “New Humanity” that, even now, is being born and will carry Man to superior levels of consciousness, a wholesome life, and harmonious alignment with constructive cosmic forces. He called that symbol “Cruz Orlada,” i.e., the “Trimmed Cross,” whose mystic symbolism Brother Aragón one night dictated to BSP as follows: “Very simply, dear son, because God is the Universe and the universe is circular, thus we have that God is a Circle; thus God is Universal. The cross inside the Circle which can be plain or “trimmed” with flames, symbol of the Sun, and also of God – i.e., the God-Christ – shall be Love, Faith, Light; it is carried the heart of union… Send it to our brother Sigurd (von Wurmb) who can spread it through his pen in the press here and abroad…. Tell him the time of the Trimmed Cross has come.”
What Do the Psychographies Mean?
On her website, Ms Bryson admonishes all to be cautious regarding alleged “meanings” and “interpretations” of BSP’s messages. She points out one such case making the rounds on the Internet that some say may refer to a catastrophic event about to take place during the up-coming London Olympic Games which we will refer to in this article. As Sigurd von Wurmb and Ms Bryson aptly point out, “BSP did not go into any trance, and all interpretations of his drawings are the sole responsibility of the persons making them, and should not be ascribed to BSP himself.” Von Wurmb said that BSP considered himself “a messenger, a channel of higher voices,” bent on warning man of impending perils and guiding him upwards. “BSP must not be forced into a circle of sensationalism, especially since there are serious and respected researchers into his life’s work.” These researchers include Ana María von Wurmb, Pedro Romaniuk, and Ms Bryson herself amongst others. One of the most striking examples is a “psychography” that clearly references the World Trade Center attacks of 2001, both regarding the image and the text which says, “North America’s Light of Liberty shall lose its shine; its torch shall not illuminate as it did yesterday, and the monument shall be twice attacked.” This psychography is dated 1939, almost thirty years before the Twin Towers were even built Baptized by Fabio Zerpa like Nostradamus Argentine born on August 8, 1898. From his childhood he said he spoke with angels, fairies and goblins. The year in the brackets is when he made the prediction, not when it will come true. https://preview.redd.it/1jqrar548aa61.png?width=250&format=png&auto=webp&s=a0de699b733c5f5a2d2b7cbf10292819de800960 "The atom will go so far as to tyrannize the world, the world will be atomized and will go blind. It will fall storms caused by the incursions of the man in the atmosphere, new diseases, sex changes, collective madness, general absurdity. The world will go dark". (year 1934) https://preview.redd.it/n2pxucj68aa61.png?width=250&format=png&auto=webp&s=922494c9028220a64db87fad22af7c8e00143b31 "Power duel between Yankees and Russians. Duel for space and terrain conquest. Although it doesn’t seem, America will ascend the throne". (year 1941) https://preview.redd.it/7ofeekl88aa61.png?width=250&format=png&auto=webp&s=86e0f7ff5efb8eb016903430426cc60516c4cc64 "The man-woman will be in two stages. One because bisex birth, the other stage will be ancestral. The evil will be the man’s vice. He will take the sex in search and will finish in a false man-woman. Medics will operate, and they will do the right thing, but, the man-woman will not be understood until the '70." (year 1937) https://preview.redd.it/kr53djme8aa61.png?width=241&format=png&auto=webp&s=9b345e87e985ef90265af2c800a51064fff60539 "The goodness will disappear from the world. The theft and the crime will seize with the environment. The creatures chastity will be corrupted by the bad example of the denaturalized homes. The weddings will go reduced, even so the lovers will be admired. The man will always let himself be seduced. They (women), will be the seductive." (year 1934) https://preview.redd.it/zbld9c5i8aa61.png?width=250&format=png&auto=webp&s=036659fc083d06d156d116d42adc3f67e9cf5898 "The tomorrow’s man will emerge from laboratory spermatic cultures. The woman will look for the son by selecting the semen offered by the medic. Preference will be given to the athletic men ( in reserve), and to the intellectuals. The vulgus man will not be borne in mind, and he will be left to disappear. The year 2000, after the cataclysm, will know this new rule, and the man-animal has fell asleep forever and the procreation will give rise to the human being without the original sin." (year 1938) https://preview.redd.it/giy9eorj8aa61.png?width=250&format=png&auto=webp&s=9361c76ff25d8c6afe7ae819c9bde878d655a6e7 "The Church will mistake its own steps and its own leaders will distort it." (no date) https://preview.redd.it/yyw900jn8aa61.png?width=250&format=png&auto=webp&s=4aaec439d6853184738308d887d92572c6e2bec5 "Rome in misfortune, the ducal city falls in desasters. Hermetism in the town of Naples. Confusion in Vatican. The Church will sink, the Pope will go out, he will become popular but late will be. The reforms will frighten the Catholics. The young priests will face the transitory elite which control the power. New Church. New ways. Secret meetings in fight. The future will be the return to the catacombs." (year 1938) https://preview.redd.it/rgr9edcp8aa61.png?width=250&format=png&auto=webp&s=88fd14a213f8fae72225c60f8c8b3d3e0f046441 "CRHIST. MARA. TIME. YES. NO. The Church will be divided in two groups, those who wait for Christ, and those who do not." (no date) https://preview.redd.it/f6s1w62s8aa61.png?width=250&format=png&auto=webp&s=23d818e5e1679fbcae1dbaa757b5f6af09d8c888 "Hitler - Mussolini. With the same aim the same end." (year 1938) https://preview.redd.it/5r4tfnlv8aa61.png?width=250&format=png&auto=webp&s=88577076406ee1f643512d6b1fb18fe3efec6d2d "Races which hate each other will join together. The earth will go in war. India, China, Japan, Russia. Africa will give the world an example. America will be witness, help, palliative and light, North America will be despised, even so, the world in the moment of the afflictions will cry out for it - but it had suffered and will be no longer." (year 1937) The Russia learned construct astral ships. (year 1938) In the sight they will have the polemics. But the men who flew will keep quiet. Because they will know without to know and without to know they will not be able to make clear what in sight they have. (year 1967) The man gets ready to visit near planets. He is already owner of still non defined ships, even in project. Yes, he will arrive, but he will arrive without to do. He will see without to see, he will say without to say. He will return without to return . He will be and he will not, because still... it is not time. (year 1960) The men will arrive to the moon. They will be there without to be. They will see without to see. They will hear without to hear. He will be back without to be. Take care! (year 1940) Two sights in one same face will carry the human in the moon flight. They will know nothing by seeing and they will see nothing by knowing. They will tell about seas, about polar caps, about rolls and about sounds; words. But nothing. All in the Nothing in the everything, because they will be in the proof. (year 1968) The astronaut earth will suffer encounters of new waves. He will be scared and he could have unexplainable surprises. He reaches the record of what he expected. But the reality will not get to them. They will be without to be and they will be there without to be. The moon will say. (year 1967) To the moon. It arrives the maximum of the cold country and it will say that it brought. It arrives the maximum of America and it will say that it brought. They have a truth and that... both will silence that. (year 1967) In the end of the proof. The lunars (natural from the moon) wait without anxiety the "earth hooks" which already knew. The lunars will give example of moderation. Will there be no revelation because the lunar being will break the earth device and nothing will be. (year 1967) The blaze comes close, the astronaut will know about the punishment and about God. The astronaut didn’t find the Lord in the heavens and the heavens will fall over him to reveal to him the almighty. The astronaut woman will be reality and she will know about realities that she didn’t see in the earth but she will found them in the skies after the final proof. (year 1957) The terraqueous astronaut will find a being which without to be will be and even so he will receive a help from the being. The terraqueous astronaut will mistake paths and he will come back in the earth without the mission, but with a new mission. The cosmos will speak! After the great proof! (year 1967) The terraqueous navigator will suffer nervous and intestinal disorders after the space flight. The genetic will suffer alterations to fecundate. The gigantism will be one of them, the mind darkness will be another. (year 1960) Human cosmonauts who staid away above, will give the guide about "certain invisible hand", ruler of the astral universe. (year 1969) In the end of the proof. The terraqueous navigator will fly to the moon. He will carry easy arguments for observation, even so he will forget alb roosters for the lunar awakening. They will be asleep without any remedy and their sleep in times. (year 1967) The weak retina will not place the astronaut man in the exact measure and place. The woman will know and will see because she has perceived by intuition. It will be with the red photograph! (year 1967) The "human bullet" cosmonauts who made prowess without to remember God not even thinking upon the discovered wonders. Suddenly they, entranced, will cry out: God! (year 1969) The science has become a baby in the presence of the continuous UFO problems. The surprises box holds, day after day, new rabbit in store, and... what a "rabbit"! The science incapable of knowing denies it. The science grows up, even... it isn’t! (year 1969) Extraterrestrial beings watch the manned needles that the humans will send in sidereal voyage, and they will kidnap them and will frighten them. They, in their return... will keep silent! Extraterrestrial women will arrive in the world to be inseminated and they will go back. Men will be kidnapped to inseminate and they won’t come back. (year 1960) Interplanetary navigators, messengers of God, angels yesterday, will arrive in the world in, every time, bigger amounts. They will show themselves in different ways with theintention to the unconscious man about the dangerof the atom. Older and superior civilizations than the actual disappeared as victims of the same power. It will be known! (year 1959) The interplanetary navigators, invisible for the human eye, angels yesterday, messengers of God are, and they will arrive, every time more and more to avoid the explosion of the atomic. They will try to impose the brotherhood and the love for the neighbour and they even infiltrate among the disoriented youth the mystic meditation and the withdrawal from the evil. (year 1939) It will be brought up for discussion the problem of the UFO, and soon it will be said that the truth must be elucidated before the end of the ends. The scientist must move away the fatuous attitude that blind him. The young will do so and... he will see! (year 1968) The traditional families will roll and they will sink in criminal causes. The new rich will fall down in spectacular crimes, but they won’t be sunk. Gold saves. The humble will be evicted, despised, forgotten. They will be the cause of vexation. The theatre will be distheatre; it will be psychic, material, irreverent, dirty. The naked will be imposed, the sex aberration, homosex, lesbianism, drugged in crimes, the crowd will applaud corrupted without to know. (year 1939) The world will be denaturalized by the power of the domestic screen. All the bad influence will be rudely spread over every home and will be imposed by the advertiser commerce which aims to the crowd. The crowd will become dull dominated by the disguised orders as easy and better paradises, the crowd delighted will contemplate the stupidity and the immorality. It will come the day when the bulk crowd will be manipulated like a sheepfold. (year 1938) The atheism will be vogue and fashion. But, like in Russia, every being will be atheist, but in his bed , he will pray!. Mephisto on the world in the ’70. (year 1938) In the end of the time the atheism will impose on the man in his material triumph. Good will be moved away. The leisure will run with the man. The man will run with the crime. The crime will run with the lie and the lie will carry the war of the nations. Then, the atheist smoke will be plunged in the smoke of the dark darkness and it will roll down the ends of the... endless! (year 1960) The man always had his price, and he hid that price. In the new conscious, when the man will be arrived, he will proclaim his price, and he will be bought like shoes or shirts. (year 1939) Enigmatic religions and lodges, impossible of being, will appear with exotic theories. False holy men will speak about new heaven and new rules to save the soul. They will struggle for the inexistence of the good and the evil. (year 1940) You ponder while passing... It will be the theft a natural habit in the world and the swindle will be a natural habit. The assault to the neighbour will be a means of life and politic sustenance, and the politics assault and... even the death! (year 1937) A country’s unfolding. The world will suffer thefts and assaults from organized gangs coming from one country, and this will live on the millions collected with their crimes. (year 1938) The humanity will be embraced by the violence. Two brothers will not live together in a room. Not even two friends. Men will kill their wives. Women will kill their husbands and sons, and sons will kill their parents. (year 1937) Invisible war! Without the World War to be declared the world will live it without to see, and it will become accustomed to that war. Labyrinth of habits will blind the world until the big thunder. (year 1939) The mushroom clouds are near! Without to be formally declared, the world war virtually will be. The man will become accustomed to that and he will not mind, and unworried he will live it. Day will be arrived in which will be a reality because of being impossible to stop the tops and so, in a desperate interest for frightening, they will threaten and when not being believed... they will launch it! Total success of the mushroom cloud! (year 1940) Change of the world near the 2022. It arrives the atomic without a solution and it will finally explode. It is not truth the actual attitude of the nation when saying and speaking about peace. They trade with the organized war. They threaten with the blue mushroom believing that they will never come to blows, but the hard yellow will say... to hell! And muddled, he will go! After that, end of the ends. Beginning of the beginnings. Light. (year 1960) In the proof. Organs graft, without age discrimination it will never give results in exact success. Even a decade needs the way what later will not be the way because it will be "the artificial plastic", which they already have. (year 1967) The hydrocortisone will be on the table in the ’70. It will be used to look for the peace in the man. Even so it won’t be. (year 1967) The science, incapable of decode the continuous astral problems, does not confess this reality and denies it, and will deny what the studious and sensible scientist knows but he doesn’t mention because he considers himself insignificant. (year 1969) Scientist, you are looking for what you shouldn’t and you don’t study what you should. Pay attention! The motherhood you are trying to achieve by means of the artificial "ribosome" will not be, in spite of its apparent probability for being. The man will never birth from neither, a test tube, nor a culture tube, not even from a controlled refrigerator. Will never the elaborated and preserved gene produce what you expect. Superior men will never be born from your hands, since the being, in the supposed case that it were born, it would be a wretched "alive-dead" because it will lack soul. Remember and don’t forget: The soul only enters trough the mother! (year 1961) Little science: You insistently try to implant the immortality in the man. You really have already the bioingemedicine with the artificial plastic. You spend your time! It will never be possible. It is good that you make prosthesis in order to alleviate sufferings, good it is that you make artificial parts in order the patient to endure temporarily a sickness. Good it is that you apply supplements to cover offending handicaps thus encouraging a safe movement. Charity. But very worst you do when you think that you still can put the man inside another man thus making the of immortal existence. No little scientist. The everlasting being comes only from God. Who tried that will perish. The death cannot be killed. The man will always die! (year 1961) Gerontologist: Go deep into the study of the man in his races. Remember, Those were arrived from different planets descended to the earth in exploration and stayed here by order of colonizing suitable places for their stability. However, the man is at first sight an inadaptable being for the taken environment. Changes of temperature and atmosphere hurt and make him ill. He does not resist the microbial, he does not tolerate the natural feeding, and because of that he becomes old. Gerontologist: Study and help the races in their struggle. It will be one day, and it will be in the triumph of the whole race. The 2000 is near! (year 1961) Science: Do you carry the bacterium of the human detriment? What does your knowledge do? Comprehend and understand: The bacterium will be launched from you in a terrible war. But, remember: It will finish with you first. For you to know... Unknown pests are close! (year 1961) After the three smokes the earth will be renewed with an unknown manure. There will be a new flora and a new fauna, and the man will be still without being and without knowledge. (year 1967) Arabia, Israel, Egypt. Quarrel in the ’70. (year 1961) Israel will have six days and rests in the seventh. (year 1951) Changing faces North America will take wrong headings. They will be in the middle of unbearable tests. They look, however they do not see. (year 1948) It closes the moment of the new gas. It comes the neurological gas. (year 1951) Trivial rosaries and rosaries will be said in the time of the repentance, the human being after the punishment, will prostrate. It will be vain! The hour will be for the just, and the just will pray for the forgiveness. God will send the love that He will be! (year 1960) Will arrive the sun to the darken world, when the sun has returned from the three days smoke. Then, will arrive the pure virtue in the expert and evolved youth. The seven virtues come back in triumph, it comes back the beauty of the faith and the felt intimacy of the hope. The charity has brought all of this. (year 1968) A white angel carrying the blonde spike of the everlasting peace will descend in the punished earth in the end of the ends, and he will say: Fortunate those who became poor of money. Fortunate those who all had and gave up having. Fortunate those who didn’t need to work and held it then to subsist. Fortunate those who were served and must serve because for him will be the future of the kingdom, because for him will be the price of the prices, because for him will be the right hand of the lord, and it will be in the blonde hour of the everlasting peace. (year 1960)
IT'S UP!! HERE WE GO. Interview with Jordan Kimball after the Jenna text scandal/cheating/break-up.
Going back to Monday. RS releases a cryptic tweet. Jenna started acting weird & anxious, despite RS not naming any names.
He told Jenna he'd call her back b/c he was on the phone with Bibiana at the time.
He called Jenna back & said it was going to be about a female & Jenna got REALLY nervous. Jordan at the time didn't think anything of it
He gets a call from her in the middle of the night. He says this is the first moment that he got a weird feeling.
She calls again the next morning & is still feeling sick/anxious. Jordan is going about his day at this point with no worries.
Jordan interjects to say that RS has given Jordan insight that makes it very hard for Jordan NOT to believe what RS posted.
The guy who came to RS knew way too much about Jenna & her life. He says the text messages are Jenna's exact style of talking/sound exactly like her & the way she texts. (her use of exclamations, etc.)
She would use that phrase "do you still love me?" in texts to Jordan as well.
Story breaks & Jordan starts getting calls/texts from BN folks. He gets a call from a dear friend that says "You need to hang up your call & call me back ASAP." That's when they told him about what RS had posted.
Says he 'sank in his seat' - didn't know what to do or how to handle it or how to act or anything.
Jordan says it's something that people say "where there's smoke there's fire" & there's a LOT of smoke here. It's all too "scary" how incriminating it all is & Jordan has no reason NOT to believe it.
Jenna has not given anything to the contrary that would explain or anything. She has never grovelled or acted innocent.
RS says that though we've all seen the texts, there was a long e-mail conversation with the man who came forward & it was all very damning. (Jordan has seen)
Jenna's response when Jordan confronted her "you know how I am when I’m drunk.. let me check my phone” "You know I say mean things sometimes, but i didn't say THIS."
He says he really hasn't talked to her all that much since this came out.
Feels that he definitely got played.
Jenna has not flat out said "NO" when asked if she did have a conversation with this man.
RS talks about how the fact that she hasn't vehemently denied it & hasn't really said anything in 24 hours doesn't look good for her.
MENTIONED THE REDDIT ARTICLE A COUPLE MONTHS AGO.
He says that this person HAS to know her in a sexual manner. Just the way she spoke & the phrases she used. Says there's no doubt in his mind that this man that came forward knows her.
Jordan sent RS text screenshots to show how the writing style was the same/same phrases used. When he saw the e-mails it made Jordan's blood hot.
Jordan says that some of the private information that RS shared helped him come to his decision to end the relationship.
Says he needs to protect himself through all this. He fell for her, but he really only knew her briefly.
Jordan's heavy breathing is killing me, yall.
Jordan says people saw him fight for her so hard on BIP. Reading that someone has such ill intentions towards him, it's hard to ever regain that trust.
Says he goes from tearing up, to shaking, to feeling sick. Hasn't eaten anything today. He's not his usual self - notes that he has no one-liners to throw in right now. It's going to take him awhile to recover.
He doesn't want to speak ill of her but says that at this point it would have to be PROVEN wrong for him to change his thoughts at all.
"If anyone thinks I'm acting in this then I need to be the pilot for the next big romance. I should be given awards."
He says he was 100% into her. He thought she was literally tailor made for him. It was definitely real for him.
He had heard some rumblings about being used for a business opportunity, but he didn't really know how to take that. He asked her how she felt & she said she loved him.
The man who came forward said "you know what, f*** it. I'm done being manipulated, I'm more than money. Here you go" & sent him all those texts/info.
RS says if a fake convo shows up on the internet, an innocent person would be screaming from the rooftops about how they're fake. Would be confronting the person who sent them in. Would be doing EVERYTHING to prove their fake. RS confirms that Jenna has not reached out to him at all.
Jenna's reaction when he ended it: she just denying it. told him she's going to prove it wrong & asked if he would be there for her.
They DID NOT talk pre-BIP. Jordan says "absolutely not"
RS says he would love to get on the phone with Jenna to confront her. Says he would ask Jenna "Tell me what name they used & what e-mail they used" about the guy who came forward.
Someone claiming to be Jenna's friend came to RS & said "Yes, Steve you are correct. The texts are real. BUT she's playing the Sugar Daddy, not Jordan, b/c he's been helping with her business & she doesn't want him to run." RS says this is UNCONFIRMED at this time. Says it would make sense to RS, but it still didn't make sense b/c that person was trying to say that it would save Jenna's relationship with Jordan?
RS asks "IF that's the case: how would that make you feel:" Jordan says that would be almost even worse. Would not change his decision
Jordan's plan from here: says him & Jenna went through a milestone in their lives & says that he does think they owe it to each other to have a conversation in person - however, he's not ready to do so yet.
RS says he hates that the story came out & he had to do it, but is glad that the truth came to light before they went further. Jordan says he really appreciates all that Steve did & shared with him.
Jordan says he really wants to try to lay low right now. His pride is bruised. He needs to do things to help him get peace right now.
RS wraps up to say that he's been in talks with Jordan since yesterday. Says that at first he wasn't a big fan of Jordan - but after dealing with this & speaking to him, he's 100% done a 180 on his thoughts on Jordan - thinks he's a great guy.
Spoiler because it's clear who will be eliminated later in this season. Not a lot of info on people from seasons other than Arie's and Becca's. Straight from his page: "Now lets talk about “Bachelor in Paradise.” Cast leaves for Mexico this weekend and filming will begin shortly after that, I’m guessing Monday or Tuesday of next week. Obviously a ton of speculation of who is going and what not. I don’t think there’s a whole lot of uncertainty of who to expect to be there, but knowing who is original cast and who isn’t, that’s tough to predict. We know that people are being brought in at all times, so this is always an ever rotating cast. What I will do is list for you everyone from Arie’s girls to Becca’s guys that I know to be/have heard are going. There will probably be one or two in the group that don’t make the final cut or maybe the info was wrong, but I’ve heard a lot of things, so this is what I’m hearing in terms of who you should expect to see that I’m pretty solid on: Arie’s Girls: Tia Booth Kendall Long Bekah Martinez Caroline Lunny Krystal Nielson Chelsea Roy Bibiana Julian Jenna Cooper Olivia Goethals (The first 4 seasons of Paradise had at least 12 girls from that calendar year’s “Bachelor” season, so expect the same, meaning there will be more of Arie’s girls there. Those are just the ones I’m pretty definite will be on) Becca’s Guys Connor Obrochta (proposal guy out of the limo) Jordan Kimball (the professional douchemodel) Clay Harbor (the good football player) Colton Underwood (the never-suited-up-for-an-NFL-game player) David Ravitz (chicken suit) Chris Randone (the guy who squealed on Chase last night) Leo Dottavio (hair guy) Joe Amabile (grocery store guy) One thing I can report is that I’m hearing Leo and Kendall (who both live in LA), are already talking and have been out together. So expect those two to immediately bond in Paradise. I’m sure there will be more, but those are ones I’m pretty solid on. I know a lot of you will have, “What about this person” or “What about that person” questions. I get it. I’m just telling you what I know as of right now. If you didn’t see a name there, it doesn’t mean they won’t be on. In addition, we are most certainly going to have international contestants on Paradise this season. Probably some repeats from Winter Games and/or pulled from other franchises. Yuki I’m hearing is definitely gonna be on, but I don’t know in what capacity. I get this feeling they’d make her the bartender or something because it’s kinda hard to go on a date with someone that doesn’t speak the language very well at all. And of course, they always pull some rando’s from previous seasons where you’re like, “Who?” Expect a couple of those mixed in as well. Of course there will be others because I only gave you names from the two most recent seasons since that will make up most of the cast."
Translator name: Quincey Nicolo Document being translated: Audio recording of the exorcism of Karin Milona, dated 6/4/2017 Purpose: Transcript to be used as evidence in an ongoing investigation in the United States. Translator notes: I will be translating verbatim, but some concepts and phrases may not make sense in their original context in English. In these cases I will insert a Translator Note and describe what was likely meant in these scenarios. This is for your benefit, but you may disregard them legally as opinion if you wish. I was also provided with a set of pictures taken during the exorcism, and I will provide descriptions as they relate to the translation. 8:15 pm
My name is Father Richarro Montelli. I am sixty-two years old and this is my twelfth exorcism. I have been authorized by the Catholic Church to perform an Exorcism for Karin Milona, who has been determined to be possessed. The afflicted, Karin, has shown the following signs as recognized by the Church. She has begun speaking purely in a dead tongue, and many octaves lower in pitch and louder than should be possible. Only the person who she is addressing can discern her meaning, which is something we have not encountered before. She predicts accidents and injury in her neighborhood. It cannot be determined if this is premonition, however. She has also show the ability to move objects and observe occurrences over some distance as it is happening. She has shown the ability to cloud a person’s vision, or make them hallucinate. No direct control of another’s mind has been observed, but the visions have persuaded others to act in a manner of the possessor’s choosing. The entity seems to be particularly powerful. Usually there is some attempt to undermine the coming exorcism. This has not been the case, as the entity has almost seemed welcoming. Due to the unusual nature and extent of some of the powers on display, we have recommended the family bring Karin to their local church, where I will be meeting them. The possessor has shown to be cunning. I must prepare.
Translator’s note: The word used for “cunning” was furbo. Apart from its meaning, the word also implies a level of respect, and in some cases admiration. Looking into his history, his seventh exorcism was fairly similar. There was an unnamed man afflicted by what they describe as a powerful demon. Two priests had attempted the exorcism prior and determined it to be successful, but the demon returned. It also apparently started attacking the priests. Father Montelli preformed the exorcism in Rome, on all three of them at once. The ritual took three days, and the demon was never reported to return. According to an eye witness, the demon’s final words to Father Montelli were “Montelli. Your name is known to us.” Reports on his next four exorcisms show very little effort was needed. Once he entered the room, the possessed would become very compliant, and the ritual would only take minutes. In this context I believe Father Montelli knew he was up against a powerful foe, and in some way was excited for the challenge. Church of Santa Bibiana: Father Montelli prepares. In attendance are Jenna Milona (sister), John Milona (father), Father Demitri, and Father Lutou.
Father Montelli: Thank you all for coming. Tonight will not be easy, so we must prepare ourselves for the trials to come. Father Lutou will be taking confession from all, including myself, Then Father Demitri will take his. Once this is complete you must keep a focused mind. We will pray and prepare for the trial ahead. You will be given a paper with notes, as there will be call and answer prayers to recite and protocol to follow. You will also be marked with holy water and a crucifix which has been blessed. Once the exorcism has begun there will be no time for questions, hesitation, or doubt. For Karin’s sake you must set your mind to war.
At this time the recording is shut off. According to the report this is when confession was taken and the ritual was explained to the family. Father Lutou then left with Jenna to bring Karin to the church. The recording picks back up over an hour later. Father Lutou had been killed in a car wreck, and Karin was being moved to the hospital. Jenna called from the ambulance, which was also involved in a wreck, to give Father Montelli their location. The recording begins as Father Montelli, Father Demitri, and John Milona arrive at the scene. I was provided a picture of the scene. The ambulance was on its side, and the fron cab appeared to be pretty mangled. Jenna was scraped up and bleeding from a few wounds, but was standing. Karin was restrained in the gurney in the road behind the ambulance. She appears to be laughing.
Father Montelli: Jenna, are you alright? Jenna: Yes, Father. It is not serious. Father Dimitri: Do you still have your paper? Are you prepared? Jenna: Yes. Father Montelli: John, take a moment to be with Jenna. We will not have time for distraction once we get started, John: Thank you, Father. Father Montelli: Dimitri, help me move her to the sidewalk.
Sounds of the gurney being rolled. Parts are scraping as it is apparently damaged, and Karin can be heard laughing at an inhuman pitch and volume.
Father Dimitri (calmly): Be silent.
The laughing stops.
Jenna: We are ready, Father. Father Montelli: Good, we shall begin. Jenna, approach Karin. You will need to remain by her side for the duration. Your task will be difficult. If she is harassed by the possessor you will need to hold and comfort her. We will not be able to intercede in this manner, so you must remain focused and vigilant throughout. John, follow Father Dimitri’s lead. Is everyone ready? All: Yes. Father Montelli: Do not keep in mind, O Lord, our offenses or those of our parents, nor take vengeance on our sins. Our Father (inaudible) And lead us not into temptation. All: But deliver us from evil.
Father Dimitri reads Psalm 53
Father Montelli: Save your servant. All: Who trusts in you, my God.
Multiple cars are heard pulling up at this point. Car doors open and close, footsteps approach.
Unidentified person: Father, we arrived as fast as we could. Father Montelli: We have already begun. Set up a perimeter, do not let anyone intervene.
Footsteps retreat, inaudible instructions are shouted in the background. Background noise indicates some kind of barrier being erected.
Father Montelli: Let her find in you, Lord, a fortified tower. All: In the face of the enemy. Father Montelli: Let the enemy have no power over her. All: And the son of iniquity be powerless to harm her. Father Montelli: Lord, send her aid from your holy place. All: And watch over him her from Sion. Father Montelli: Lord, heed my prayer. All: And let my cry be heard by you. Father Montelli: The Lord be with you. All: May He also be with you. Karin: (loud screaming in an unknown language) Father Montelli: You will soon see, demon. Let us pray.
Father Montelli’s prayer is barely audible through the screams from Karin. The prayer is read steadily without pause or change in inflection.
Father Montelli: SILENCE!
Karin falls silent.
Father Montelli: I command you, unclean spirit, whoever you are, along with all your minions now attacking this servant of God, by the mysteries of the incarnation, passion, resurrection, and ascension of our Lord Jesus Christ, by the descent of the Holy Spirit, by the coming of our Lord for judgment, that you tell me by some sign your name… Karin: (though the words are in what I assume is the previously used unknown language, I could understand their meaning) I am the sightless one, granter of visions. I am the Second Seal, unbroken, yet unleashed. I am a bringer of distrust, of fear, of war. Father Montelli: (Clearly shaken) I command you, moreover, to obey me to the letter, I who am a minister of God despite my unworthiness; nor shall you be emboldened to harm in any way this creature of God, or the bystanders, or any of their possessions. Karin: (Speaks an unknown language, this time I cannot understand the meaning)
At this point, many bible verses are read. Karin thrashes about, screaming and laughing. A picture was taken at this time. Jenna is seen holding Karin around the shoulders. Fathers Montelli and Dimitri appear to be making the sign of the cross over themselves, and John is on his knees looking over his daughters. In the background there appears to be a police barricade set up, manned by men in robes. It’s hard to make out exactly what is happening, as the background is a bit blurry and dark.
Father Montelli: See the cross of the Lord; begone, you hostile powers!
There is a very loud hiss, probably from Karin.
All: The stem of David, the lion of Juda's tribe has conquered. Father Montelli: Lord, heed my prayer. All: And let my cry be heard by you. Father Montelli: The Lord be with you. All: May He also be with you.
Father Montelli says an inaudible prayer as Karin begins to scream frantically. It appears to be her voice, not the entity’s.
Father Montelli: I cast you out, unclean spirit, along with every satanic power of the enemy, every spectre from hell, and all your fell companions; in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. Begone and stay far from this creature of God Karin: (in her voice) Father… please… (In the other voice, screaming in the unknown language) Father Montelli: For it is He who commands you, He who flung you headlong from the heights of heaven into the depths of hell. Karin: (in her voice) Father, I can’t… (simultaneously laughing is heard from the other voice) Father Montelli: It is He who commands you, He who once stilled the sea and the wind and the storm. Karin: (unknown language) Father Dimitri: The line will hold, demon. Father Montelli: Hearken, therefore, and tremble in fear, Satan, you enemy of the faith, you foe of the human race, you begetter of death, you robber of life, you corrupter of justice, you root of all evil and vice, seducer of men, betrayer of the nations, instigator of envy, font of avarice, fomenter of discord, author of pain and sorrow. Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) So many titles, but they are not mine. Unknown man (from distance, barely audible): Father, we need to move! We’re being overrun! Father Montelli: Why, then, do you stand and resist, knowing as you must that Christ the Lord brings your plans to nothing? Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) Do you not know of His plans? Have you not read every book in your archives? Have you not ventured beyond the locked gates, into the forbidden vaults? Perhaps you should adopt the title trespasser? Eater of fruits?. Father Montelli: Fear Him, who in Isaac was offered in sacrifice, in Joseph sold into bondage, slain as the paschal lamb, crucified as man, yet triumphed over the powers of hell. Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) Perhaps, nonbeliever? Father Montelli: Begone, then, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Give place to the Holy Spirit by this sign of the holy cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, who lives and reigns with the Father and the Holy Spirit, God, forever and ever. Karin: (loud laughter)
In the background you can hear something large and metal, like a frame or scaffolding fall and scatter.
Unknown man: Pick up the girl and take her inside. Father, gather your men and follow them. Continue the ritual inside. We can no longer keep you safe out here. Father Montelli: Jenna, hold tightly to your sister. Brothers, do not let them separate.
From here there are sounds of shouting, things being throw, fighting, dragging, doors slamming, frantic echoes in hallways, distant gun shots, and finally the closing of a door as voices gather in what sounds like a smaller room. A series of pictures shows a mob of people overrunning a barrier. Men in robes push back but are being overwhelmed. A man in a black robe appears to be praying, arms stretched towards the crowd. Men in red robes with guns are seen stepping out of a vehicle. The next shows two men in robes carrying Karin’s gurney down a dim hallway. Jenna is in step with them and appears to be trying to comfort her sister. The last shows the seven of them in a small room. The two unidentified men are lighting candles, which is the only source of light in the room. Karin appears to be smiling.
Father Montelli: I adjure you, ancient serpent, by the judge of the living and the dead, by your Creator, by the Creator of the whole universe, by Him who has the power to consign you to hell, to depart forthwith in fear, along with your savage minions, from this servant of God, who seeks refuge in the fold of the Church. Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) Serpent? Who are you addressing? Father Montelli: I adjure you again, not by my weakness but by the might of the Holy Spirit, to depart from this servant of God, whom almighty God has made in His image. Yield, therefore, yield not to my own person but to the minister of Christ. For it is the power of Christ that compels you, who brought you low by His cross. Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) You know my name. Call upon me, and I will do as I am told. Father Montelli: Tremble before that mighty arm that broke asunder the dark prison walls and led souls forth to light. Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) You are known to us, Montelli. You who would steal a key. Who would trespass on what your high priests and bishops would call sacred ground. Who would study forbidden scrolls. Father Montelli: May the trembling that afflicts this human frame, the fear that afflicts this image of God, descend on you. Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) You who no longer believes. Father Montelli: Silence, fiend! You dare speak of my belief? I who have so dutifully banished so many of you? You who know my name? You would presume to tell me I no longer believe in Almighty God? Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) We know you believe in God, as do we. You no longer believe He will always answer your call. You no longer believe that when what was written on the black scroll comes to pass, that His eye will remain on this world. You know my name. Call upon me, and I will do as I am told.
There is a long pause here. Father Montelli starts weeping, and Father Dimitri tries to comfort him. The dialogue between them is barely audible. In the background you can hear fighting from somewhere in the building. It escalates and moves closer.
Father Montelli: (as he starts to speak there is a loud spike of static) Karin: (unknown language, but understandable) Yes, eater of fruits. What is your will? Father Montelli: Do what you must.
At this point the door bursts open and gunfire is heard. The tape ends suddenly, and there are no further pictures of the event.
[Spoilers/Data] A look at BIP contestants and social media, Hannah's contestants on BIP included.
If you don't want to know which of Hannah's contestants are on BIP that have not yet been eliminated, please avoid reading further. --------------- IF YOU'RE ON MOBILE: You will need to swipe right for the table! There's a bunch of columns. Edit: I've added screenshots because I got some messages about how hard it was to read. They're at the end of the post. Some notes below before I jump in... Overall Rank: While overall rank looks at each contestant compared to every person to ever go on this show (650 people), you have to keep in mind that I'm missing Instagram accounts for 269 of those 650 people. So the overall rank is actually their rank compared to the 381 people I do have accounts for. Percentile Rank: Inspired by high school rankings (flash backs anyone? Is that just a Texas thing?) I wanted to know what percentile each contestant fell into when compared to those 381 formecurrent contestants. Feeling savage, might delete l8tr, idk. Number of Followers: This information is now taken DAILY for those 381 people with known Instagram accounts. Yay! 😀 Increase/Decrease: Looking at April-June, how are their accounts doing? For Colton's contestants, my first season tracking data, I frequently compare to April -- which were their numbers at the end of Colton's season airing. Including Emojis -- 🥇🥈🎖🏆 ⬆️⬇️↔️ 👑sorry in advance if these don't work on your browser. Based on RS's released list of contestants... As always, my jokes are intended to be playful and not meant to be mean spirited.
Name
Overall Rank
Percentile Rank
Top __ %
# Followers
Increase/Decrease?
Notes
Hannah Godwin
18th
4.72%
Top 10% 🥇
1,020,650 🏆
↔️ Generally stagnant after a slight 2,000 drop from April-June
By far most followed contestant on BIP. 1st to Caelynn.
Caelynn Miller-Keyes
29th
7.61%
Top 10% 🥇
753,717
⬇️Slight decrease - peaked June 1st, has dropped since from 755,609 to her number end of Colton's season. (~2k decrease)
Important to note her instagram has been set to private, which is likely the reason for the decrease. 2nd most followed contestant on BIP... Always runner-up 👑😈
Tayshia Adams
84th
22.05%
Top 25% 🥈
247,818
⬇️Peaked in April at 248,663. Steady decrease since ~1k.
Still shocked a 4th place contestant is ranked so low.
Nicole Lopez-Alvar
128th
33.60%
Top 50%
100,403
↔️ Stagnant since her peak in April/May
Onyeka Ehie
194th
50.92%
Bottom 50%
30,884
↔️ Stagnant since her peak in April/May
Demi Burnett
37th
9.71%
Top 10% 🥇
663,295
⬆️Increase, gain of 20k since April.
Sydney Lotuaco
179th
46.98%
Top 50%
35,680
↔️ Stagnant/slight decrease since April
Kristina Schulman
35th
9.19%
Top 10% 🥇
705,742
⬇️Was on a steady increase February-June 1st but has been decreasing since. (Almost 1k drop in just over a week -- this is odd given previous numbers)
February: 700,990, April: 702,965, June 1st: 706,496
Bibiana Julian
73rd
19.16%
Top 25% 🥈
301,062
⬇️Decrease, loss of 15k followers since February.
Blake Horstmann
44th
11.55%
Top 25% 🥈
563,432
⬆️Increase 12k since February with slight decrease in May
Dylan Barbour
209th
54.86%
Bottom 50%
24,144
⬆️Season still airing
Little screen time so far. Ranked 11th on Hannah's season
Connor Saeli
115th
30.18%
Top 50%
138,914
⬆️Steady increase
Ranked 4th most followed on Hannah's season so far
Cam Ayala
249th
65.35%
Bottom 50%
12,259
↔️ Stagnant since May 21st. Last week he had lots of negative days.
Has been hovering around 12k for 2 weeks now. Ranked 17th on Hannah's season.
John Paul
151st
39.63%
Top 50%
58,951
⬆️Steady increase
Ranked 6th on Hannah's season
Kevin Fortenberry
217th
56.96%
Bottom 50%
21,200
⬇️Decrease over the past 5 days.
Can we talk about how this guy is ranked higher than Cam? Ranked 12th Hannah's season
Joe Barsano
296th
77.69%
Bottom 25%
5,283
↔️ Stagnant since Hannah's premiere.
Ranked 22nd Hannah's season
Matt Donald
187th
49.08%
Top 50%
33,931
⬆️Steady increase
Ranked 10th Hannah's season
Chris Bukowski
190th
49.87%
Top 50%
32,882
⬇️1k decrease since February.
I thought you retired, bro.
Side notes:
I find it fascinating how poorly Cam is doing on Instagram. We've seen "villains" in the past do so well on Instagram. He's really the first villain to do really poorly in the rankings.
Chris Bukowski? Dude, your season was 7 years ago.
Episode 1 of “Winter Games” was released to the media this week, and as I do for the first episode of “Bachelor” and “Bachelorette,” I have my way of watching it and thus spoiling it. Do they want me to? Of course not. This episode is shown just like the others in that it shows everything up to the rose ceremony, because they don’t want media possibly giving away eliminations. Well, you’ll get those from me today. And the first “rose ceremony,” isn’t really a rose ceremony. They mix it up a bit for the first elimination, which you’ll see later. I’ve not been entirely on board with this show if you’ve read any of my thoughts the last few months. After watching it, I can actually say it was better than I thought. Not terrible, but by no means not television that’s re-inventing the wheel or something either. It’s definitely different than BIP in the sense that every episode has a challenge, and the winners get date cards to ask someone on a date. BIP the date cards go to incoming people, and whoever they decide to give it to so they can further a storyline. So that’s where “Winter Games” is like “Bachelor Pad,” is you actually have to earn your date card. Before I break down the episodes, lets get to the particulars you need to know. -This show will air on Tuesday AND Thursday for the next 2 weeks for 2 hours each episode. There will be a 1 hour “Winter Games Tell All” show to be shown after the finale episode on Thursday, the 22nd. So 8 hours of “Winter Games” coverage, then we get a 1 hour show where they bring everyone back to talk about the experience. They are filming that “Tell All” show next Friday, the 16th in LA. -Here are the contestants (12 from the US, 14 International): USA Men: Ben, 29, “The Bachelor” Season 20 Dean, 26, “The Bachelorette” Season 13 (Rachel Lindsay) Eric, 29, “The Bachelorette” Season 13 (Rachel Lindsay) Jamey, 33, “The Bachelorette” Season 13 (Rachel Lindsay) Josiah, 29, “The Bachelorette” Season 13 (Rachel Lindsay) Luke, 33, “The Bachelorette” Season 12 (JoJo Fletcher) Michael, 37, “The Bachelorette” Season 9 (Desiree Hartsock Siegfried) USA Women: Ashley I., 29, “The Bachelor” Season 19 (Chris Soules) Clare, 36, “The Bachelor” Season 18 (Juan Pablo Galavis) Lesley, 30, “The Bachelor” Season 17 (Sean Lowe) Bibiana, 30, “The Bachelor, Season 22 (Arie Luyendyk Jr.) Lauren G., 27, “The Bachelor, Season 22 (Arie Luyendyk Jr.) International Men: Benoit, 31, “The Bachelorette” Season 1 – Canada Christian, 34, “The Bachelorette” Season 1 – Switzerland and Germany Courtney, 31, “The Bachelorette” Season 2 – Australia Jordan, 34, “The Bachelor” Season 2 – New Zealand Kevin, 33, “The Bachelorette” Season 1 – Canada International Women: Ally, 24, “The Bachelor” Season 3 – New Zealand Jenny, 34, “The Bachelor” Season 1 – Finland Laura, 29, “The Bachelor” Season 1 – United Kingdom Lily, 21, “The Bachelor” Season 3 – New Zealand Nastassia, 26, “The Bachelor” Season 3 – Sweden Rebecca, 26, “The Bachelor” Season 3 – Sweden Tiffany, 31, “The Bachelor” Season 4 – Australia Yuki, 21, “The Bachelor” Season 1 – Japan Zoe, 25, “The Bachelor” Season 1 – China -In each challenge, the men compete against the men, and the women compete against the women. So there’s one male winner and one female winner of each challenge. -When the show starts off, they show about 3 minutes of a season preview that really gives a ton away of who ends up with who. They don’t do quick shots either. You clearly see who hooks up and who doesn’t. Will get to that in a bit. -They do use intro videos for the US contestants to re-introduce them to us. The ones who get intro videos are: Ben, Josiah, Dean, Clare, Bibiana, Lesley, and Ashley I. -The first 45 min of the show is basically from the opening ceremonies where we are introduced to all the international contestants. The US team was introduced and walked down the street together, where the international team (since there were so many different countries represented) just arrived by their country, so if it was only one person from their country, they were walking by themselves holding mini flags of their country. -Chris Harrison and Hannah Storm are the hosts, while Ashley Brewer (a sports anchor in Los Angeles) handles the play-by-play and does “live” interviews with the contestants. -For most of the international contestants, we get them in ITM’s telling us what season they were on, and some we even see clips of them in their season. Either when they were eliminated, or when they “won.” It’s bizarre seeing the “Bacheloette” in other countries. -The international contestant who steals the show and will probably be everyone’s favorite is Yuki from Japan. Why? Because she knows about 5 words of English, yet is ridiculously happy to be here, and all they do all episode (and all season) is play up the fact she doesn’t speak English. It’s actually pretty funny. No translator, she sits in on all the conversations even though she has no idea what anyone is saying. Even does a few ITM’s and basically just says the only English words she knows. -Once in the house, we see who’s interested in who. The first couple to hit it off is Josiah and Ally from New Zealand. They’re off on the couch, she’s very curvy, Josiah lets her know he likes her curve, and these two start sucking each other’s face off. Major tongue action. -In the beginning, we also see Lesley and Dean flirting. Lesley is shown in ITM’s gushing over how cute Dean is and Dean makes it known he’s into Lesley as well. They also show Rebecca from Sweden talking to Luke on the couch. -Of course, this wouldn’t be a season without all attention focused on Ashley I, the fact that she’s a virgin, and she’s immediately attracted to Kevin from Canada. Bibiana is also attracted to Kevin as well, and Kevin is seen talking to her, which immediately starts making Ashley I. insecure. -And oh yeah, Christian from Germany and Benoit from Canada both seem to take an interest in Clare. This will play out later on. -The first competition is the biathlon. There will be two heats for each sex, and the top 3 finishers in each heat moves on to the finals. They have to ski a lap, shoot a paint gun hitting a target 3 times, ski another lap, shoot the paint gun while laying down hitting the target 3 times, then ski to the finish line. -Before it starts, they give everyone a chance to practice skiing, and Ally falls on her ass. Or bum as she calls it. It’s bruised and she can’t compete, but Josiah goes in to check on her and says he needs to win for her. Josiah is terrible on skis and never comes close. First Heat (Men): Benoit, Ben, Luke, Josiah, Michael G. This is the only one of the heats that they basically show from start to finish. Benoit finishes first, Luke is 2nd, and Ben is 3rd, so they move on to the finals. Second Heat (Men): Kevin, Eric, Dean, Christian. There might’ve been others in this, but they basically only show highlights of it. Eric finished dead last way behind everyone else and Chris Harrison was on the course with the microphone telling him the competition ended 20 minutes ago and Eric still was just finishing up. Dean finished 1st, Kevin was 2nd, and Christian was 3rd moving on to the finals. First Heat (Women): Clare, Zoe, Jenny, Stassi, Lily, and Yuki. Again, we just see the highlights, but Stassi finished 1st, Jenny was 2nd, and Lily was 3rd. Second Heat (Women): Lauren G., Rebecca, Lesley, Bibiana, and some others. Only the highlights, but Lauren G got injured. Rebecca was 1st, Lesley was 2nd, and Bibi was 3rd. Women’s Final (showed first): Lily, Stassi, Jenny, Lesley, Bibi, and Rebecca. Rebecca from Sweden ends up winning pretty easily. She even skated through the finish line backwards to kinda rub it in. Men’s Final: Luke, Christian, Kevin, Benoit, Ben, and Dean. This was basically a battle between Kevin and Dean. And of course, we’re getting Bibi and Ashley’s reactions during the race because both are interested in Kevin. Kevin ends up winning. -Back at the house, we see Kevin pull both Bibiana aside and Ashley aside to talk to them. Bibiana tells him she would’ve picked him if she would’ve won, and Ashley flirts with him during his time. Ashley says she thought Kevin would pick Bibiana, but after talking to him, she thinks she has a chance. Kevin ends up asking Bibiana and Ashley loses it. Basically the crying Ashley you’ve seen in all the commercials is from the first episode when he chose Bibiana over her. She’s in an ITM bawling her eyes out saying, “Literally this has been the pattern for me the last 2 years…friend zone central…why does this always happen?” Kevin and Bibiana’s date is barely shown. They go to some restaurant and they just make out. -We don’t even see Rebecca ask Luke on their date. We just see them sitting together already on their date, and they go outside, and there’s a firework show. The two of them start making out. -Back at the house, Dean & Lesley’s flirting heats up as she talks about her boobs a lot because of her double mastectomy she had 9 months ago, and no guy has seen them since, so her and Dean start giggling over that. We see them start making out on the couch. -We also see more of Josiah and Lily making out and also our first all international couple – Courtney and Lily start making out at the top of the stairs out of nowhere. -The only other “coupling” we see in the first episode is Clare and Benoit, with Christian on the side. Christian says in ITM’s he’s attracted to Clare, but I don’t think we ever see him saying that to her. Benoit and Clare are in the kitchen, Benoit is cooking eggs, then they have a short kiss. Then later on, they’re by the fire and share another kiss that really looked like it was played on a loop. Christian makes a comment about Clare kissing Benoit, and they basically foreshadow that love triangle. -The first “rose ceremony” is more in the “Bachelor Pad” model because no roses are given out. The contestants are told to write down the name of someone that they don’t want to be there and put it in a box. 5 people are being sent home, bringing the total to 21. Well, technically 20 because Jordan from New Zealand hasn’t arrived yet. He had Visa issues but I believe shows up in episode 2. Rose Ceremony Eliminations: Eric Bigger, Jamey Kocan, Lauren Griffin (US shows), Zoe from China, and Laura from the UK. Since the rose ceremony wasn’t shown in the first episode released to the media, I don’t know who voted for who. Just know that’s who was eliminated. I will have the remaining 3 episode spoilers for you in Tuesday’s column, since the show starts that night. However, right now I will give you the final competition, what it was, who wins, and what the main storyline is. Don’t read any further if you don’t want to know. (SPOILER) The final competition is ice skating. The four couples that make the finals are: Courtney & Lily Luke & Stassi (they went on a date in episode 2) Kevin & Ashley I. (they go on a pottery date, a la “Ghost”, I believe in episode 3) Dean & Lesley (their first date is episode 2 as well) Kevin & Ashley I. are the “winners” of Winter Games. There is no prize, there are no engagements, they are just declared the first winner of the “Bachelor Winter Games.” So yes, Ashley I. will be all up in our grills for all 4 episodes. She finally gets the guy, she ends up being the winner, and her relationship with Kevin from Canada takes front and center. Here’s the main storyline once this season concludes: Ashley loses her virginity to Kevin. They are a “couple” now. Well, as much as someone in this franchise can define “couple.” She’s been to Toronto, he’s spent time with her post-show in CA and other places and I hear he’s going to be spending a good month in CA with her once this show kicks off, or maybe after it’s done airing. Whatever the case may be, they are an item now. But as I said, they go back to film the “Bachelor Winter Games Tell All” next Friday, and I’m hearing the focal point of that show is them getting Kevin to admit he’s in love with her or commit to her. And from what I’ve heard, he’s not. It’s been reported to me that Kevin’s sole intention of doing this show was to be the next “Bachelor: Canada.” And if not that, he just wants fame, he wants notoriety, and he was strictly looking to hook up with whatever girl in the house would garner him the most attention. Well, Lesley was already linked with Dean from the word go. Clare wasn’t available. And Bibi and Lauren G. aren’t big enough names in the franchise yet. Enter Ashley I. Some say it might be a showmance, but there’s no doubt Ashley is goo-goo ga-ga over him (shocker), and I’m hearing he’s not as into her as she’s into him (gee, where have we heard that before?). That’s what the after show will most surely focus on. I’m being told this guy was strictly out to get more famous, and he knew by hooking up with Ashley, that’d get people talking about him. The virginity thing is gonna get a ton of run now, and it’s almost like if this guy doesn’t commit to her at the “Tell All” taping next Friday, he’s gonna come across as a complete douche. And even if he does, another guy to keep your eye on because I’ve heard his intentions have way more to do with extending his brand than actually finding a girlfriend. Basically, this the worst guy someone like Ashley I. should’ve ever gotten involved with since we know how she reacts when she likes a boy. I mean, we’ve seen how Ashley reacts to boys she likes that she never had sex with. Now this? Oh boy. Don’t buy this relationship at all, regardless of what this guy ends up doing. This is gonna be a sh** show.
Talks about her being the first, or one of the only recent, women cast of Indian or Pakistani descent. She discussed it with producers beforehand to talk about how much she wanted to talk about her ethnicity.
Said she started watching the bachelor franchise halfway through Nick's season. Her sister was the one that got her hooked. She DMed BachelorCasting on Instagram and they sent her the big package to fill out. She flew out to LA to meet production and was cast pretty quickly.
She was told she'd be on the show before the Bachelor was announced. She was hoping for Peter since she had seen Rachel's season and knew he was open to dating a woman of color.
She never thought of backing out when she found out Arie was the lead. She thought he was different from how she perceived him to be, but didnt explain much.
Marikh was never very close with Becca in the house, but she thought that she would go far because she seemed down to earth and naturally pretty. She was close to Lauren B, they roomed together all through her time on the show. She really thought Maquel would go far also based on her looks and flashy entrance.
She had a lot of time with Arie on the first night. She received the second rose and was very confident. Based on the first night, she thought she would make it pretty far. Spoke about their families and her last relationship.
Talk about Chelsea coming off as a villian on the first night. Saw Chelsea bickering with a few other girls and was very surprised that she got the first impression rose.
During the wrestling match group date, people kept getting hurt when they were practising. She was paired with Lauren B and they were both very girly and tried to avoid hitting each other which came off slightly sexual. They chose their own pairs, but the outfits and personas were assigned.
Glam shaming during group date in Lake Tahoe- she had been in the group with Chelsea searching for the hot tub. Someone told Arie that she had been using the compass as a compact mirror. She was a little insecure in her relationship with him anyway because she felt they had lost momentum from the first night. Felt like Chelsea was trying to make herself look better to Arie by putting her down.
It got brought up again at WTA and she got irritated at Brittane for inserting herself into the argument when she'd previous had no comments. They talk about sides being taken, Marikh said Seinne, Lauren S, Bibiana, and even Krystal were on her side and defending her.
Bowling group date where Krystal had her meltdown. Marikh was on the losing team so she was happy that she got the extra time. The teams were in different vans going home so she didn't hear the rant in the car ride. Initially thought people were ganging up on Krystal, but didn't understand her extreme reaction.
Krystal kind of kept her distance from everyone and just focused on her relationship with Arie. Baca was really open and shared everything after her 1 on 1, and Krystal was the complete opposite which rubbed a lot of people the wrong way. Beat around the bush and was very coy, and wouldn't tell them any details or answer their questions.
Marikh thinks that people are quick to blame editing, but at the end of the day, she did actually say those things and you as a contestant can't be angry when that footage is then aired. She was really hurt by Krystal saying that the women were desperate and beneath her. On WTA Krystal did admit that she should have tried harder to make good relationships with the women.
Said that Bekah was mature for her age in some respects, but there are some things that she still needs to learn. They talk about the Tia / Bekah animosity that seems to have festered over time, despite having said that they put it behind them. Marikh supported Raven stepping in on Tia's behalf as her close friend, especially since Tia couldn't defend herself. Thought Bekah was very rude and mean spirited on WTA telling Tia that the guys she dated treated her like a queen where Tia's exes treated her like trash. Marikh only thinks that Bekah apologized for her tweeting because Ravel called her out on it. She sounds like she's #TeamTia in this dispute.
On the Becca / Lauren switch: Thought it was a shitty situation for both of the women. She doesn't think that Arie fully knew what he wanted until he was going through the Bachelor process. It seemed like he didn't go with his gut a lot of the time, based on the women he was taking on dates, etc. He would tell Marikh what he was looking for, and then his actions and who he spent time with said the complete opposite. When he was out of the whole process, he probably was finally true to himself and realized he should have chose Lauren. RS thinks that Becca's ex coming back played a big role in him initially proposing to her. Marikh says she disagrees, but her explanation makes it sound like she actually agrees lol.
In the later weeks, it seemed to the women like Becca's relationship with Arie was cooling off. She thought that Chelsea and Maquel would have made it farther than they did. Lauren and Arie really started connecting on the wilderness date in Tahoe.
Marikh was offered a spot on Paradise, but she didn't feel like that show was the right fit for her. She is insecure and always likes to know if a guy is actually into her, so she didn't think she would be happy in the Paradise environment of people dropping in and out. She also didn't really think that she would fit well with the guys from Becca's season that she had seen.
Talks about her spread / video with Maxim India. They reached out to her on Instagram after she appeared on the Bachelorette. She was a little reluctant, especially to be in lingerie for the shot, because she was afraid she would then be pigeon-holed into that type of modeling. But she realized that this may be a once in a lifetime opportunity so wanted to embrace it. She did get to pick all of her outfits and they made sure she was comfortable in everything. She hasn't really received any negative backlash from her spread.
She hasn't really had any Bachelor guys sliding in her DMs or trying to meet up with her. She said that she's met DeMario, Iggy, and Fred from Rachel's season. So... the real winners.
She's been lucky and had little to no negative comments on her Instagram. She does say that the couple times that she has gotten those comments, she has immediately deleted the comment and then blocked the user.
Her family owns two Indian restaurants. She started the one that was featured in the show with her mom, and had a hand in all aspects of the restaurant- plating, menus, scheduling, etc. They recently leased the restaurant and so now she is pursuing other opportunities. She is looking to move to LA and get into acting...
The bowling date was her favorite date that she went on. She felt like she was able to be more comfortable and be herself, as opposed to the demolition derby, wrestling, or wilderness hiking.
Creepy fan experience: A guy first started sending roses to her to her restaurant. She noticed that Seinne had received similar roses and it turned out they were from the same guy. He kept calling her restaurant, and then he got her mom's phone number and her home address. They was a little scared, but didn't want to be rude because he knew so much personal information about there that they didn't want to make him angry and set him off somehow. Eventually the calls died out, but she never took any formal action.
She looks up to Mindy Kaling, as an actress, because as an Indian woman she has broken down a lot of barriers for women of her ethnicity in Hollywood / the industry.
She's Team Lauren in the Becca / Lauren match up, just because she's close friends with her, but says she wishes Becca nothing but the best and definitely wants the best for her.
I'm a little annoyed that RS didn't ask about the Maquel backlash considering Marikh repeatedly said how close they were. I know he likes to act like he's above the fray, but considering Maquel even came out and made a public statement, it would have been interesting to hear her perspective.
So Reality Steve has been releasing Arie's girls as he sees them. I will use this week's theorycrafting post to list out who they are thus far and to give you completely accurate information about their lives. But I want to spice it up a bit, so I'll play two truths and a lie for each of them. Bonus points if you can guess the lies. 1) Chelsea Roy: chelsearoy Dear Chelsea here is 29 years old and has a three year old son named Sammy who will totally not come up at all during the show no siree. She is from Maine, and has a ridiculous cold tolerance judging by how many bikini photos she has on Maine beaches. 2) Lauren Schleyer: laurenschleyer Lauren is 31 and works at AT&T as the social media manager. She went to Baylor and as a result is related to Chip and Joanna Gaines. Hopefully she makes it to hometowns so we see them on the show. Reality Steve says her tweets are pretty funny, but then didn't link any so I'll assume he's just blowing smoke out his ass. 3) Maquel Cooper: maquelx Maquel (seriously wtf) is 23 and "models". She was married to the son of a super rich family but then got divorced last year. She's best friends with someone from DWTS (who cares) but supposedly is unable to dance due to a surgical screwup that swapped the big toes on her feet. I hope it comes out on the show. 4) Tia Booth: tiarachel91 Tia is bffls with Raven. She is 28 and a physical therapist. Steve says that there is something to do with an ex back home, so you know that we'll here about how he was unable to satisfy her and how she's never had an orgasm or whatnot. But I'm not convinced that she isn't actually Raven. I mean there are pictures of them together, but those could be photoshopped. It's instagram, anything is possible. 5) Caroline Lunny: carolinelunny Caroline is a realtor in Florida (do I smell love with her and RE already?) She was a former Ms. Massachusetts that year which was a real pain for her because she had to change her name and everything. She graduated from Suffolk University and is actually a 60 year old implanted into a 25 year old body because usually you wait until your 2nd hip surgery before moving down to Ft. Lauderdale. 6) Rebecca Kufrin: bkoof She goes by Becca, and is 27. Her mom survived breast cancer and her dad died 8 years ago so get ready for that one episode where RE totally muffs the emotional aspect. She works at Skyaa, which is a company I don't know but has a name that sounds like an eagle is saying it so that's pretty rad I guess. She won Instagram's award for having coolest username. Also her dog and Rachel's dog are related (2nd cousins). 7) Jenna Cooper: jennacooperfit Oh boy a fitness trainer who wants to have a youtube presence? Color me shocked. But in all seriousness, Steve trashed this 29 year old fitness instructor for this video but I thought it was sweet. She definitely does have a case of the crazy eyes though. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Fuck, now I'm gonna have a smiley blonde trainer waiting for me at my car to shove a shake down my throat. I didn't mean it I swear! 8) Valerie Biles: valeriebiles This 25 year old lives in Nashville and is a marketing coordinator at Twin Peaks (for those of you who don't know, it's like Hooters). Steve called it one of the greatest restaurants ever, and honestly I'd much rather make fun of him for that than call out any egregiousness in Valerie's profile so way to keep it classy Steve. Also she will have red hair on the show. 9) Marikh Mathias: maroosworld This 27 year old is the director of social branding at some company in Salt Lake City. I was unaware that anything happened in Salt Lake City aside from Gordon Hayward leaving and Not Drinking, but we have two people from Utah this year so far so neato on her front. She also models and has an IMDB page, which is behind as I hear that she is going to show up on Quantico as Priyanka Chopra's evil twin on an episode. 10) Lauren Burnham: laureneburnham Another Lauren B who is blonde. Wow ABC, think you can mix it up a bit? This 25 year old works at Vonage in the sales department, so that really doesn't help at all with specificity. She also went to med school and then got a BA in Psych so that feels a little backwards. I actually had her call me once because Vonage was offering a deal so that's pretty neat. 11) Kendall Long: keykendall88 So Kendall here works as a set dresser in LA, but that is not even the coolest part of her bio. She has a twin sister named Kylie. You can't make this shit up. She also plays the ukelele and sings (which you know will happen at least once) and actually worked on the Kardashian 10 year anniversary. Also she and Kendall Jenner have the same birthday. This is so fucking weird you guys. I honestly hope she gets notoriety from this show so her and the Kardashians can hang out together. 12) Bibiana Julian: bibi_julz Bibiana (or Bibi as I will call her from here on out) is actually related to Bibi Netanyahu (her dad and him are cousins) and her dad decided to name her after him. She's 30, and she is an Executive assistant at MTV (for those of you unfamiliar, she's like a secretary/personal assistant/smorgasbord). She was also voted Sexist Cheerleader of 2006 according FHM, a fact that Steve could quote from memory. 13) Seinne Fleming: seinneceleste This 27 year old graduated from Y A L E and is a property manager somewhere in California. Steve posted no other facts about her so I'll say that she looks so much like Jubilee that I did a double take and thought they were bringing Jubilee back. I was gonna make some joke about how they're actually related but then I was like "Jubilee is awesome I'm not going to trash Jubilee" so there you go, now you understand my though processes. 14) Jenna Delaney: jennyddesigns Steve only posted one picture (nice digging, buddy), but this 27 year old hails from the Windy city after bouncing between TCU and Columbia College Chicago. She manages a graphic design site where she specifies that she is a "terrible dancer, loves card games" and has "never had ketchup" which is obviously important to graphic design. 15) Bri Amaranthus: briamaranthus Bri here is a segment reporter for Comcast SportsNet Northwest and also covers the Oregon Ducks. One of my friends who works sports in the Oregon area has met this girl and says she's really nice, and even linked me to a video of one of her segments. She seems pretty good at her job. He also said that these kinds of jobs are typically given to reasonably attractive graduates whom they can pay next to nothing, so if she's looking for an opportunity to shill and maybe move up, this seems like the ticket. 16) Jacqueline Trumbull: trubullina Jackie here works as a clinical research coordinator at Mt. Sinai in New York. She seems like a nice lady, even though there is literally nothing about her. She's looking for jobs in research and mental health. She could be the next Taylor? 17) Bekah Martinez: whats_ur_sign Bekah here (different from Becca before) is a nanny living and working in LA who recently got accepted to UC Irvine to major in art. Apparently also she doesn't own any bras. What a coincidence, I don't own any bras either. #freethenipple 18) Brittany Taylor: ohhaybtay Brittany works for Google, and lives in Austin, TX. I tried searching for her on linkedin but there are a lot of Brittany Taylor's so I kinda gave up, because I was curious if she was a software engineer or did marketing or something like that, but I couldn't tell. But it's pretty dope that she works at google regardless. She also has a cute corgi. 19) Lauren Jarreau: LaurenJ225 Lauren is 33 years old and lives in Baton Rouge. She used to work in Vegas as a server at a luxury hotel, and has done some modeling in the past, but moved back to Baton Rouge to pursue work in the psychological field. 20) Britt Johnson thebrittdoll Britt was apparently on the same show that both Lucas and Blake were on, the "Ex Isle". Although I don't think she was dating either one of them. She was even on Blake's season! 21) Amber Wilkerson: everyonceinastyle This 29 year old fashion bloggespray tanner (not joking on that one) hails from Denver CO, where business is really booming. She offers a deal where if you buy weed from the dispensary next door, you get 50% off a spray tan. As a result, multiple people have passed out in her booths. But business is still good. She also has a hilarious instagram name. 22) Annaliese Puccini: annaliesep This actress/writer lives in LA (shocker) and has a video on Funny or Die, which you can watch here. It's okay. I'd give it a funny. 23) Krystal Nielson: kdollfit It's Krystal with a y and she'll suplex you if you get it wrong. This lady here went to Boise State for Communications then UCLA for broadcasting with the hopes of making it as an entertainment reporter, but found a passion in fitness and has competed in many fitness competitions. She currently works in San Diego as an Orange Theory coach, which is the equivalent of being one of those MLM leaders but for fitness instead of Amway beauty products. 24) Ali Harrington: aliharrington This 25 year old OU graduate works at Trunk Club in Dallas. For those of you who don't know (me), Trunk Club is a site that provide personal stylists for people who want/need them. Her outfits are pretty on point, so I could see why she would do that. 25) Ashley Luebke: ashleyluebke This girl is destined for RE if only because she also has that weird spelling in her last name. Luebke and Luyendyk, it's perfect. Anyways, she's 25 and works as a real estate agent in Palm Beach. She also looks a lot like Thandie Newton, so she's got that going for her, especially in this picture. 26) Jessica Carroll: jesscarrolltv She's got a tv at the end of her instagram so you guessed it, she's a TV personality. She also kinda looks like Olivia. But she's from Canada. Aussie Bach fans might recognize her as her stint as Lauren from Matty J's season, which begs the question why is she even on here since she's got a man (yeah I spoiled it but if you haven't been keeping up for the past 3 months then I don't know what to tell you). Oh yeah and she's 26 and living in LA, so she fits right in with the other girls. 27) Nysha Norris: nyshaxoxo This 30 year old nurse lives in Anderson, SC. I have no idea where that is. She's put all her social media on lockdown, and even with that she barely posts which means that she is way too well adjusted to go on this show. 28) Olivia Goethals: oliviagoethals This 23 year old from Naperville, IL has amazing fucking hair. Like seriously, her hair is so amazing. If she continues on this show, I guarantee you every single episode I will say "Wow Olivia has amazing hair" at least once. She works at Agency360, which is some sort of marketing agency in Chicago. She played softball at North Central College, so she stayed pretty local. 29) Lauren G. That's all I got. Steve you dirty fucking liar, you need to give more than just a name and where she lives (California obviously). Apparently she works as a recruiter but I don't know. Anyways, those are the girls. That's it. No spoilerino. Enjoy :D
[Spoiler] Guesses for BIP and Bachelorette? *includes RS's top four spoilers*
Spoiler tagging this so those of us who keep up with RS can speak freely: I think Tia is a shoe-in for Bachelorette. While I adore Kendall, she doesn't have as much mainstream appeal as Tia and I think that TPTB would consider her a "safe" bet. They're giving Tia a fantastic edit, she's Raven's friend, and she has a natural kind of charm/charisma that translates well on camera. Lauren B could be a dark horse pick if they decide to give her an amazing edit later on, but right now I don't see it. She's stunning and seems sweet, but from what's been shown so far, we haven't seen her having the charisma or "it" factor necessary to carry this show as the lead. Granted, I would've said the same think about Jojo at this point two seasons ago, so we'll see what happens. As far as BIP goes, Bekah, Bibiana, Caroline and Maquel are locks and I think will for sure be there. I could see Krystal and Chelsea going on in the hopes of getting a redemption edit, given that we saw that with Taylor last year and she came out of the show engaged. I could also see Annaliese playing a similar role that Christen did last year, where she's a contestant that was likable but eliminated early, and then wound up becoming a key player on BIP. Kendall (if they don't choose her as the next 'ette) will for sure get asked to go on, and maybe Seinne (although I don't see her agreeing to it). IMPORTANT EDIT Apparently there's speculation that Arie may be pulling a Mesnick and wind up dumping Becca for Lauren B. These rumors are unfounded at the moment, but if they turn out to be true, I'm going to go ahead and say that Becca will 100% be the next 'ette. I mean, talk about a storyline.
So Reality Steve has been releasing Arie's girls as he sees them. I will use this week's theorycrafting post to list out who they are thus far and to give you completely accurate information about their lives. But I want to spice it up a bit, so I'll play two truths and a lie for each of them. Bonus points if you can guess the lies. 1) Chelsea Roy: chelsea_roy_ Dear Chelsea here is 29 years old and has a three year old son named Sammy who will totally not come up at all during the show no siree. She is from Maine, and has a ridiculous cold tolerance judging by how many bikini photos she has on Maine beaches. 2) Lauren Schleyer: laurenschleyer Lauren is 31 and works at AT&T as the social media manager. She went to Baylor and as a result is related to Chip and Joanna Gaines. Hopefully she makes it to hometowns so we see them on the show. Reality Steve says her tweets are pretty funny, but then didn't link any so I'll assume he's just blowing smoke out his ass. 3) Maquel Cooper: maquelx Maquel (seriously wtf) is 23 and "models". She was married to the son of a super rich family but then got divorced last year. She's best friends with someone from DWTS (who cares) but supposedly is unable to dance due to a surgical screwup that swapped the big toes on her feet. I hope it comes out on the show. 4) Tia Booth: tiarachel91 Tia is bffls with Raven. She is 28 and a physical therapist. Steve says that there is something to do with an ex back home, so you know that we'll here about how he was unable to satisfy her and how she's never had an orgasm or whatnot. But I'm not convinced that she isn't actually Raven. I mean there are pictures of them together, but those could be photoshopped. It's instagram, anything is possible. 5) Caroline Lunny: carolinelunny Caroline is a realtor in Florida (do I smell love with her and RE already?) She was a former Ms. Massachusetts that year which was a real pain for her because she had to change her name and everything. She graduated from Suffolk University and is actually a 60 year old implanted into a 25 year old body because usually you wait until your 2nd hip surgery before moving down to Ft. Lauderdale. 6) Rebecca Kufrin: bkoof She goes by Becca, and is 27. Her mom survived breast cancer and her dad died 8 years ago so get ready for that one episode where RE totally muffs the emotional aspect. She works at Skyaa, which is a company I don't know but has a name that sounds like an eagle is saying it so that's pretty rad I guess. She won Instagram's award for having coolest username. Also her dog and Rachel's dog are related (2nd cousins). 7) Jenna Cooper: jennacooperfit Oh boy a fitness trainer who wants to have a youtube presence? Color me shocked. But in all seriousness, Steve trashed this 29 year old fitness instructor for this video but I thought it was sweet. She definitely does have a case of the crazy eyes though. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Fuck, now I'm gonna have a smiley blonde trainer waiting for me at my car to shove a shake down my throat. I didn't mean it I swear! 8) Valerie Biles: valeriebiles This 25 year old lives in Nashville and is a marketing coordinator at Twin Peaks (for those of you who don't know, it's like Hooters). Steve called it one of the greatest restaurants ever, and honestly I'd much rather make fun of him for that than call out any egregiousness in Valerie's profile so way to keep it classy Steve. Also she will have red hair on the show. 9) Marikh Mathias: maroosworld This 27 year old is the director of social branding at some company in Salt Lake City. I was unaware that anything happened in Salt Lake City aside from Gordon Hayward leaving and Not Drinking, but we have two people from Utah this year so far so neato on her front. She also models and has an IMDB page, which is behind as I hear that she is going to show up on Quantico as Priyanka Chopra's evil twin on an episode. 10) Lauren Burnham: laureneburnham Another Lauren B who is blonde. Wow ABC, think you can mix it up a bit? This 25 year old works at Vonage in the sales department, so that really doesn't help at all with specificity. She also went to med school and then got a BA in Psych so that feels a little backwards. I actually had her call me once because Vonage was offering a deal so that's pretty neat. 11) Kendall Long: keykendall88 So Kendall here works as a set dresser in LA, but that is not even the coolest part of her bio. She has a twin sister named Kylie. You can't make this shit up. She also plays the ukelele and sings (which you know will happen at least once) and actually worked on the Kardashian 10 year anniversary. Also she and Kendall Jenner have the same birthday. This is so fucking weird you guys. I honestly hope she gets notoriety from this show so her and the Kardashians can hang out together. 12) Bibiana Julian: bibi_julz Bibiana (or Bibi as I will call her from here on out) is actually related to Bibi Netanyahu (her dad and him are cousins) and her dad decided to name her after him. She's 30, and she is an Executive assistant at MTV (for those of you unfamiliar, she's like a secretary/personal assistant/smorgasbord). She was also voted Sexist Cheerleader of 2006 according FHM, a fact that Steve could quote from memory. 13) Seinne Fleming: seinneceleste This 27 year old graduated from Y A L E and is a property manager somewhere in California. Steve posted no other facts about her so I'll say that she looks so much like Jubilee that I did a double take and thought they were bringing Jubilee back. I was gonna make some joke about how they're actually related but then I was like "Jubilee is awesome I'm not going to trash Jubilee" so there you go, now you understand my though processes. 14) Jenna Delaney: jennyddesigns Steve only posted one picture (nice digging, buddy), but this 27 year old hails from the Windy city after bouncing between TCU and Columbia College Chicago. She manages a graphic design site where she specifies that she is a "terrible dancer, loves card games" and has "never had ketchup" which is obviously important to graphic design. 15) Bri Amaranthus: briamaranthus Bri here is a segment reporter for Comcast SportsNet Northwest and also covers the Oregon Ducks. One of my friends who works sports in the Oregon area has met this girl and says she's really nice, and even linked me to a video of one of her segments. She seems pretty good at her job. He also said that these kinds of jobs are typically given to reasonably attractive graduates whom they can pay next to nothing, so if she's looking for an opportunity to shill and maybe move up, this seems like the ticket. 16) Jacqueline Trumbull: trubullina Jackie here works as a clinical research coordinator at Mt. Sinai in New York. She seems like a nice lady, even though there is literally nothing about her. She's looking for jobs in research and mental health. She could be the next Taylor? 17) Bekah Martinez: whats_ur_sign Bekah here (different from Becca before) is a nanny living and working in LA who recently got accepted to UC Irvine to major in art. Apparently also she doesn't own any bras. What a coincidence, I don't own any bras either. #freethenipple 18) Brittany Taylor: ohhaybtay Brittany works for Google, and lives in Austin, TX. She works in talent acquisition there, and is a fan of scootering around the new Austin building on Fridays. She has a knack for finding pools on the top of buildings, which is super dope and I want that in my life. She also has a cute corgi. 19) Lauren Jarreau: LaurenJ225 Lauren is 33 years old and lives in Baton Rouge. She used to work in Vegas as a server at a luxury hotel, and has done some modeling in the past, but moved back to Baton Rouge to pursue work in the psychological field. 20) Britt Johnson thebrittdoll Britt was apparently on the same show that both Lucas and Blake were on, the "Ex Isle". Although I don't think she was dating either one of them. She was even on Blake's season! 21) Amber Wilkerson: everyonceinastyle This 29 year old fashion bloggespray tanner (not joking on that one) hails from Denver CO, where business is really booming. She offers a deal where if you buy weed from the dispensary next door, you get 50% off a spray tan. As a result, multiple people have passed out in her booths. But business is still good. She also has a hilarious instagram name. 22) Annaliese Puccini: annaliesep This actress/writer lives in LA (shocker) and has a video on Funny or Die, which you can watch here. It's okay. I'd give it a funny. 23) Krystal Nielson: kdollfit It's Krystal with a y and she'll suplex you if you get it wrong. This lady here went to Boise State for Communications then UCLA for broadcasting with the hopes of making it as an entertainment reporter, but found a passion in fitness and has competed in many fitness competitions. She currently works in San Diego as an Orange Theory coach, which is the equivalent of being one of those MLM leaders but for fitness instead of Amway beauty products. 24) Ali Harrington: ali_harrington_ This 25 year old OU graduate works at Trunk Club in Dallas. For those of you who don't know (me), Trunk Club is a site that provide personal stylists for people who want/need them. Her outfits are pretty on point, so I could see why she would do that. 25) Ashley Luebke: ashleyluebke This girl is destined for RE if only because she also has that weird spelling in her last name. Luebke and Luyendyk, it's perfect. Anyways, she's 25 and works as a real estate agent in Palm Beach. She also looks a lot like Thandie Newton, so she's got that going for her, especially in this picture. 26) Jessica Carroll: jesscarrolltv She's got a tv at the end of her instagram so you guessed it, she's a TV personality. She also kinda looks like Olivia. But she's from Canada. Aussie Bach fans might recognize her as her stint as Lauren from Matty J's season, which begs the question why is she even on here since she's got a man (yeah I spoiled it but if you haven't been keeping up for the past 3 months then I don't know what to tell you). Oh yeah and she's 26 and living in LA, so she fits right in with the other girls. 27) Nysha Norris: nyshaxoxo This 30 year old nurse lives in Anderson, SC. I have no idea where that is. She's put all her social media on lockdown, and even with that she barely posts which means that she is way too well adjusted to go on this show. 28) Olivia Goethals: oliviagoethals This 23 year old from Naperville, IL has amazing fucking hair. Like seriously, her hair is so amazing. If she continues on this show, I guarantee you every single episode I will say "Wow Olivia has amazing hair" at least once. She works at Agency360, which is some sort of marketing agency in Chicago. She played softball at North Central College, so she stayed pretty local. 29) Lauren G. That's all I got. Steve you dirty fucking liar, you need to give more than just a name and where she lives (California obviously). Apparently she works as a recruiter but I don't know. Anyways, those are the girls. That's it. No spoilerino. Enjoy :D
Bibiana Name Meaning Historically, surnames evolved as a way to sort people into groups - by occupation, place of origin, clan affiliation, patronage, parentage, adoption, and even physical characteristics (like red hair). Many of the modern surnames in the dictionary can be traced back to Britain and Ireland. Meaning of Bibiana: Possibly an early variant of VIVIANA. Alternatively, it may be a feminine derivative of the earlier Roman cognomen VIBIANUS. Statistics Of The Name Bibiana. How many people in the U.S have the name Bibiana: 2,539. Rank of the name Bibiana in the U.S.: 6,147th. How many letters are in the name Bibiana? 7 ♥ Add to my Namelist The name Bibiana means Alive and is of Greek origin. Bibiana is a name that's been used primarily by parents who are considering baby names for girls. Bibiana Name Meaning. The meaning of Bibiana is “Lively”. Keep in mind that many names may have different meanings in other countries and languages, so be careful that the name that you choose doesn’t mean something bad or unpleasant. Search comprehensively and find the name meaning of Bibiana and its name origin or of any other name in our database. Also note the spelling and the pronunciation of the name Bibiana and check the initials of the name with your last name to discover how ... In Spanish Baby Names the meaning of the name Bibiana is: Lively. The meaning of the given name Bibiana represents intuition, enlightenment, dreams, incoherence, anxiety, charisma and a timid persona. Advertisement. What Does Bibiana Mean? A person who has the potential to attain spiritual enlightenment! Your main strengths are related to introspection and intuition. Essentially you are able to unite the feminine and masculine. Finding balance within two ... Meaning: The meaning of the name Bibiana is: Alive, Lively. Please feel free to read what others say about this name and to share your comments if you have more information. N.B. Sometimes it happens that another name has the same meaning. There is nothing surprising in this: both names have the same origin or the same numbers of numerology. Bibiana name meaning, Arabic baby Girl name Bibiana meaning,etymology, history, presonality details. Bibiana Rhyming, similar names and popularity. Bibiana. Name Popularity Related Names Related Ratings Comments Namesakes Name Days. 70% Rating. Save. Gender Feminine. Usage Spanish, Italian, Late Roman. Pronounced Pron. bee-BYA-na (Spanish, Italian) [key · IPA] Expand Links. Meaning & History. Possibly an early variant of VIVIANA. Alternatively, it may be a feminine derivative of the earlier Roman cognomen VIBIANUS. Family Tree · Details ... Meaning of Bibiana, Information about First Name Bibiana, Spanish Origin Names, Choose babynames from thousunds of names data base from various regions and coutries.